Grey Jokes / Recent Jokes
What' s big and grey with horns? An elephant marching band! What's yellow on the outside and grey on the inside? An elephant disguised as a banana! What's big, grey and flies straight up? An elecopter! What's grey, carries a bunch of flowers and cheers you up when your ill? A get wellephant! What's grey and never needs ironing? A drip dry elephant! What's big and grey and red? A sunburnt elephant! What did the hotel manager say to the elephant that couldn't pay his bill?"Pack your trunk and clear out!" How do you get an elephant into a matchbox? Take all the matches out first! What weighs 4 tons and is bright red? An elephant holding its breath!
What' s grey, has four legs and jumps up and down? An elephant on a trampoline! What's grey and wrinkly and jumps every twenty seconds? An elephant with hiccups! What's grey and goes round and round? An elephant in a washing machine! What's grey and highly dangerous? An elephant with a machine gun! What's big and grey and lives in a lake in Scotland? The Loch Ness Elephant! What's big and grey and has 16 wheels? An elephant on roller skates! What goes up slowly and comes down quickly? An elephant in a lift! What's as big as an elephant but weighs nothing? An elephant's shadow!
What has two grey legs and two brown legs? An elephant with diarrhea. What do you give an elephant with diarrhea? Lots of room!
What grey, has a wand, huge wings and gives money to elephants? The tusk fairy! What has 3 tails, 4 trunks and 6 feet? An elephant with spare parts! What's grey but turns red? An embarrassed elephant! What's grey, beautiful and wears glass slippers? Cinderelephant! When should you feed milk to a baby elephant? When it's a baby elephant! How do you know when there is an elephant under your bed? When your nose touches the ceiling! What do you call an elephant that flies? A jumbo jet! What did the grape say when the elephant stood on it? Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
Meyer, a lonely widower, was walking home along Delancey Street one day wishing something wonderful would change his life, when he passed a Pet Store and heard a squawking voice shouting out in Yiddish, "Quawwwwk. .. vus machst du. .. yeah, du. .. outside, standing like a schlmiel. .. eh?"
Meyer rubbed his eyes and ears. He couldn't believe it. The proprietor sprang out of the door and grabbed Meyer by the sleeve. "Come in here, fella, and check out this parrot. .."
Meyer stood in front of an African Grey that cocked his little head and said, "Vus? Ir kent reddin Yiddish?"
Meyer turned excitedly to the store owner. "He speaks Yiddish?"
"Vuh den? Chinese maybe?"
In a matter of moments, Meyer had placed five hundred dollars down on the counter and carried the parrot in his cage away with him. All night he talked with the parrot in Yiddish. He told the parrot about his father's adventures coming to America, about more...
What is grey and hairy and lives on a man's face? A mousetache.