Grinch Jokes / Recent Jokes
How to Tell if You're a Grinch
This is a set of essential personality tests to prepare you misfit readers for Christmas and your New Year's resolutions:
1. You reuse last year's Christmas cards and send them out under your own name (5 points).
2. You steal light bulbs from you neighbor's outdoor display to replenish your own supply (5 points, 10 if neighbor's whole light sets or lighted Santa goes out).
3. You have dressed a dog or cat as Santa Claus, elf helper, or reindeer (10 points for each; if you dressed an endangered species, 5 extra points).
4. You put out last year's stale candy canes for children (1 point for each piece of sticky candy). If you put out a chocolate or marzipan Santa also, add 10 points.
5. You enclose a shoddy and inferior gift from Target, Walmart, or K-Mart in a Bloomingdale's or other prestige box to impress your friends (5 points for each infraction).
6. You make collect long distance phone calls to your family on Christmas day more...