Growth Jokes / Recent Jokes
In the beginning was the Plan
And then came the assumptions
And the assumptions were without form
And the Plan was completely without substance
And darkness was upon the faces of the workers
And they spake unto their Group Heads, and sayeth:
"It is a crock, and it stinketh!"
And the Group Heads went unto their Section Heads, and sayeth:
"It is a pail of dung, and none may abide the odour thereof."
And the Section Heads went unto their Managers, and sayeth unto them:
"It is a container of excrement, and it is very strong, such that none may abide by it."
And the Managers went to their Director, and sayeth unto him:
"It is a vessel of fertilizer, and none may abide its strength."
And the Director went unto his Vice-President, and sayeth:
"It contains that which aids plant growth, and it is very strong."
And the Vice-President went unto the President, and sayeth unto more...
In The Beginning was The Plan.
And then came the Assumptions And the Assumptions were without form
And the Plan was completely without substance and the darkness was
upon the face of the workers and they spoke among themselves,
saying... "It is a crock of shit, and it stinketh."
And the workers went unto their Supervisors and
sayeth, "It is a pile of dung and none may abide the odor thereof."
And the Supervisors went unto their Managers and sayeth unto them,
"It is a container of excrement and it is very strong, such that
none may abide by it."
And the Managers went unto their Directors and sayeth, "It is a
vessel of fertilizer, and none may abide its strength."
And the Directors spoke amongst themselves, saying one to another,
"It contains that which aids plant growth, and it is very strong."
And the Directors went unto the Vice Presidents and sayeth unto
them, "It more...
In The Beginning was The Plan.And then came the Assumptions And the Assumptions were without formAnd the Plan was completely without substance and the darkness wasupon the face of the workers and they spoke among themselves, saying... "It is a crock of shit, and it stinketh." And the workers went unto their Supervisors andsayeth, "It is a pile of dung and none may abide the odor thereof."And the Supervisors went unto their Managers and sayeth unto them,"It is a container of excrement and it is very strong, such thatnone may abide by it."And the Managers went unto their Directors and sayeth, "It is avessel of fertilizer, and none may abide its strength."And the Directors spoke amongst themselves, saying one to another,"It contains that which aids plant growth, and it is very strong."And the Directors went unto the Vice Presidents and sayeth untothem, "It promotes growth and is very powerful."And the Vice Presidents went unto more...
Include your children when baking cookies!
Safety Experts Say School Bus Passengers Should Be Belted
Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
British Left Waffles on Falkland Islands
Lost: small apricot poodle. Reward. Neutered. Like one of the family.
A superb and inexpensive restaurant. Fine food expertly served by waitresses in appetizing forms.
Dinner Special - Turkey $2.35; Chicken or Beef $2.25; Children $2.00.
For sale: an antique desk suitable for lady with thick legs and large drawers.
For sale: a quilted high chair that can be made into a table, pottie chair, rocking horse, refrigerator, spring coat, size 8 and fur collar.
Four-poster bed, 101 years old. Perfect for antique lover.
Now is your chance to have your ears pierced and get an extra pair to take home, too.
Wanted: 50 girls for stripping machine operators in factory
Wanted: Unmarried girls to pick fresh fruit and produce at night.
We do not tear your more...
•Include your children when baking cookies! •Safety Experts Say School Bus Passengers Should Be Belted•Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says•British Left Waffles on Falkland Islands•Lost: small apricot poodle. Reward. Neutered. Like one of the family. •A superb and inexpensive restaurant. Fine food expertly served by waitresses in appetizing forms. •Dinner Special -- Turkey $2. 35; Chicken or Beef $2. 25; Children $2. 00. •For sale: an antique desk suitable for lady with thick legs and large drawers. •For sale: a quilted high chair that can be made into a table, pottie chair, rocking horse, refrigerator, spring coat, size 8 and fur collar. •Four-poster bed, 101 years old. Perfect for antique lover. •Now is your chance to have your ears pierced and get an extra pair to take home, too. •Wanted: 50 girls for stripping machine operators in factory•Wanted: Unmarried girls to pick fresh fruit and produce at night. •We do not tear your clothing with more...
Illiterate? Write today for free help.
Auto Repair Service. Free pick-up and delivery.
Try us once, you'll never go anywhere again.
Tired of cleaning yourself? Let me do it.
Our experienced Mom will care for your child. Fenced yard, meals, and smacks included.
Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children.
Man wanted to work in dynamite factory. Must be willing to travel.
Stock up and save. Limit: one.
Semi-Annual after-Christmas Sale.
3-year old teacher needed for preschool. Experience preferred.
Mixing bowl set designed to please a cook with round bottom for efficient beating.
Girl wanted to assist magician in cutting-off-head illusion. Blue Cross and salary.
Dinner Special -- Turkey $2. 35; Chicken or Beef $2. 25; Children $2. 00
For sale: antique desk suitable for lady with thick legs and large drawers
Now is your chance to more...
A few days after returning from a business trip to the Far East, the man notices a strange growth on his penis. He visits several doctors and keeps getting the same response, "You were screwing around in the Far East, it's very common there, there's no cure, there's no choice but to cut it off."
He panics and figures that if it is so common in the Far East, they must know how to cure it so he returns to see a doctor there.
After examining him, the doctor says, "I see you have been fooling around in my country. I must tell you this is a very common problem here. Have you seen any other doctors?"
"Yes I have, back home in the USA," the man replies.
"I'll bet they told you it would have to be cut off," says the doctor.
"Yes, they did," answers the man.
Smiling, the doctor says, "That is not correct. It will fall off by itself!"