Gynecologist Jokes / Recent Jokes

With one look at his voluptuous new patient, all the gynecologist's professional ethnics went right out the window. Instructing her to undress completely, he began to stroke the soft skin of her inner thigh.
"Do you know what I'm doing?" he asked softly.
"Checking for any dermatological abnormalities, right?"
"Right." crooned the doctor, beginning to fondle her breasts and gently pinch her nipples, "And now?"
"Looking for any lumps that might be cancerous."
"Right you are," reassured the doctor, placing her feet in the stirrups and entered her. "And do you know what I'm doing now?"
"Yup." she said, lookig down.
"Catching herpes."

A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who never owned a car.

A gynecologist decides to quit his job to fufill his life long dream of becoming a mechanic. He decides to take mechanic courses and he does so for a couple of months up until he must take the test. The test consists of taking apart a car's engine and putting it together perfectly for a score of 200.

He does his test and feels confident that he did well.

A week later he receives a call,

"This is your regarding your test," The man on the phone says.

"Yes, how did I do?"

"You got 400 over 200"

"400 over 200? how did I get that?"

"You got 100 for taking the motor apart perfectly."

"Ok"

"You got 100 for putting it together perfectly."

"So I got a perfect score? How did I get the other extra 200?"

The man hesitates and answers, "That's for doing it all through the muffler!"

A young lesbian goes to her gynecologist for her yearly pelvicexamination. She puts on the paper gown and awaits him to come intothe exam room. He instructs her to get up onto the table and placeher feet in the stirrups. As he is examining her she hears him saying "mmmm... mmmhmmm". Hecompletes the examination, instructs her to dress and then meet himin his office when she is done. In his office she asks him if there was anything unusual that heobserved during the exam because she could not help but hear hisnon-verbal comments." Oh, that" he says." I was just admiring you. You have the cleanestvaginal area that I have ever seen in all my years of practice." The young woman proudly smiled and replied, "Why thank you! I have awoman come in twice a week and clean it!"

Woman goes to her Gynecologist for an exam. He puts her on the table, turns the lamp on and after looking under the sheet, exclaims, "You've got the biggest hole I've ever seen!" The woman is enraged, highly insulted and she get up, threatens him with a lawsuit and leaves.
She goes home and decides she'll check it out. She gets a full length mirror, puts it on the floor; takes off all her clothes and straddles the mirror. About this time her husband comes in and asks, "What the hell are you doing?" "I'm dancing" replies the woman and her husband responds: "Careful you don't step in that big 'ol hole."

Crazy Sally went to her gynecologist when she got her vibrator stuck inside of her. "To remove that vibrator," said the doctor, "I'm going to have to perform a very long and delicate operation." "I don't think I can afford that," said Sally. "Could you just replace the batteries?"

At a Gynecologist convention in Switzerland two gynecologists were talking. One from France says "There was a woman in my office yesterday with a clitoris like a watermelon."

Another one from England says, "That's impossible, if she had a clitoris the size of a watermelon she couldn't walk."

The one from France responded, "You English, always thinking about size. I was talking about taste."