Hairdresser Jokes / Recent Jokes

Too bad all the people who know how to run this country are busy running taxicabs or cutting hair.

This TRUE STORY from my secretary.
Last week her mother was getting her usual "do" when her hairdresser relayed a previous-day experience:
The hairdresser (owner) was getting ready to close up her shop when a man came in and asked if she could give him a "quick cut" before she closed. She agreed, and as she was trimming the guy's hair, he put his hand under the "cape" and the cape started moving. (She became somewhat uncomfortable.)
Then, the lady got REAL concerned when the man put his OTHER hand under the cape and the cape started moving MORE; she thought she was trimming the hair of a PERVERT. She then panicked, took a hairdryer and smashed the man up-side his head, causing him to black out on the floor.
The lady hurried and called 911, police came... only to find out that the poor guy was JUST CLEANING HIS GLASSES!

One day a blonde went to get a haircut. The hairdresser asked what hairstyle she wanted. The blonde did not answer because she was wearing headphones. The hairdresser asked again but still she did not answer. The hairdresser was getting impatient so she took of the headphones and the blonde collapsed on the floor. The hairdresser was interested to know what the blonde was listening to so she put the headphones to her ear and she heard... Breath, Breath, Breath"

one day a blone whent in to a hairdressers wearing headphones, she told the hairdresser to cut her hair. He said
"sure, can i take off your headphones?" She said
"NO NO NO just cut around them. so she had her hair cut.
The next month she whent into the Hairdressers wearing headphones and asked the hairdresser to cut her hair. He said
"sure but can i take off your headphones?" she again said
"NO NO NO just cut around them. So she had her hair cut.
The next month she whent into the hairdressers wearing headphones and asked the hairdresser to cut her hair. Unfortunatelly for her the hairdresser was new and forgot to ask if he was allowed to take off her headphones. So he took them off and she dropped dead on the floor. He picked up the headphones and put them to his own ears and listened. They were saying
"breathe in, breathe out, breathe in, breathe out."

Four men are sitting in a bar having drinks. One of the men goes to the bathroom. Then the three remaining men start to chat about their sons. The first man says:
"My son is so great! He just got an honorable discharge from the army, and one of his friends gave him a million in stocks!"
The second guy waves this off and says:
"My son is even better. He just got to the CEO chair of a great company, and one of his friends gave him a new car!"
The third guy waves both of them off and says:
"My son is best of all! He just got into the House, got a 10 dollar an hour raise, and one of his friends just gave him a new house!"
They start to argue, then the fourth guy comes back. They ask him about his son, and he says:
"My son stinks! He started out as a hairdresser, is still a hairdresser after fifteen years, and he's gay! He must be pretty attractive though, cause he just gave his THREE boyfriends a million in stocks, a new car, more...