Halloween Jokes / Recent Jokes
A witch joke
How did the witch feel after she was run over by a car?
Tyred!
A cannibal joke
What do cannibal secretaries do with leftover fingernails?
They file them!
A ghost joke
Where do undertakers go in October?
The hearse of the year show!
A vampire joke
What’s a vampire’s favourite dance?
The fangdango!
A Halloween joke
What did the really ugly man do for a living?
He posed for Halloween masks!
A witch joke
How do witches lose weight?
They join weight witches!
Halloween Funnies:
What do Skeletons say before eating? Bone Appetite.
What do blondes and Jack-O-Lanterns have in common? Both have blank expressions and are hollow inside.
Why did the Vampire get fired from the Blood Bank? He was caught drinking on the job.
Why do ghosts have so much trouble dating? Women can see right through them.
Why are Vampires Democrats? They want Gore in
2000.
What kind of clothes do Zombies wear? Decay NY.
Why aren't there any famous skeletons? They're a bunch of no bodies.
What kind of music do Mummies listen to? Wrap.
What do you call a guy turned on by a witch? Scared stiff.
Doctor, doctor, Im so ugly. What can I do about it? Hire yourself out for Halloween parties.
Yo mama so ugly when she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, no professionals."Yo mama so ugly she looks out the window and got arrested for mooning.Yo mama so ugly just after she was born, her mother said "What a treasure!" and her father said "Yes, let's go bury it."Yo mama so ugly they push her face into dough to make gorilla cookies.Yo mama so ugly they filmed "Gorillas in the Mist" in her showerYo mama so ugly they didn't give her a costume when she tried out for Star Wars.Yo mama so ugly instead of putting the bungee cord around her ankle, they put it around her neckYo mama so ugly she gets 364 extra days to dress up for Halloween.Yo mama so ugly when she walks into a bank, they turn off the surveillence camerasYo mama so ugly her mom had to be drunk to breast feed herYo mama so ugly her mom had to tie a steak around her neck to get the dogs to play with her.Yo mama so ugly when she walks down the street in September, people say more...
Halloween Funnies:
What do Skeletons say before eating? Bone Appetite.
What do blondes and Jack-O-Lanterns have in common? Both have blank expressions and are hollow inside.
Why did the Vampire get fired from the Blood Bank? He was caught drinking on the job.
Why do ghosts have so much trouble dating? Women can see right through them.
Why are Vampires Democrats? They wanted Gore in 2000.
What kind of clothes do Zombies wear? Decay NY.
Why aren't there any famous skeletons? They're a bunch of no bodies.
What kind of music do Mummies listen to? Wrap.
What do you call a guy turned on by a witch? Scared stiff.
What happened when the girl dressed as a spoon left the Halloween party? No one moved. They couldn't stir without her.
Yo mama so ugly the government moved Halloween to her birthday.Yo mama so ugly that if ugly were bricks she'd have her own projects.Yo mama so ugly they pay her to put her clothes on in strip joints.Yo mama so ugly she made an onion cry.Yo mama so ugly they filmed "Gorillas in the Mist" in her shower!Yo mama so ugly when they took her to the beautician it took 12 hours.. . for a quote!Yo mama so ugly they put her in dough and made monster cookies!Yo mama so ugly she tried to take a bath the water jumped out!Yo mama so ugly she looks out the window and gets arrested!Yo mama so ugly even Rice Krispies won't talk to her!Yo mama so ugly Ted Dansen wouldn't date her!Yo mama so ugly for Halloween she trick or treats on the phone!