Headman Jokes

a) It's an excepted belief by most, that another's dog enters someone's house they always cannot find a stick to beat the animal. Then when the stick or the broom is available no dog rushes in. But when the beating stick is on hand it's always the Village Headman's Dog!

b) A mother with her young son after bath at the river asked the son to go early and she would wash the balance clothes and come later. However, she gave her wrap around cloth having washed to put on the line once he reach home; so it would be dry on her return.
The young son placed the washed cloth of his mother, on the head and kept walking slowly on the edge of the paddyfield.
Right in front of him was the Village Headman, who asked him what's on his head.
The boy answered, "Ammage Reddha!" (Mother's Cloth).
Over his reply, the angered Village Headman slapped him and warned him for' disrespecting him with fould language!"

A village headman once noticed a sudden rise in the population of his village. To control it, he requested one of his rich relatives (who was an ardent swadeshi follower) to set up a condom factory near the village. It was done and very soon each unmarried adult male individual started getting condoms for free. But after two years the village headman was shocked to find that his village's population had doubled! After investigations the headman went straight to the relative and gave him a good dressing down saying 'Fool! Everything shouldn't be made of KHADI!'

A challenge for a joke on Pithecanthropus met with a suitably lame response:
Brad the caveman was wandering around the steamy jungle when he was attacked by a sabertooth tiger.
During the tussle they both fell into a hole dug by Brad's tribe, who were the first ever humans to try this method of catching animals for food. The tribe hearing the noise of the fight raced to the hole, which they called a Pit and were joined by another tribe, who were still using the throw-stones at the animal method.
The Headman from this latter tribe couldn't work out what was going on and looking down thought that Brad must be a new type of man. The Headman grunted "nggh mfguk wolhj" (or "What him be?").
At that moment Brad got the upper hand on the largest member of the cat family and lifting the big pussy up flung it out of the pit.
The Headman of Brad's tribe arrived and asked what had happened to which one of his tribe pointed at the hole and said more...

There was a shortage of rice in Sri Lanka some years ago. Well to do and the able were the selected crowd did enjoyed this luxary. Most others just pretended that they too enjoy the same. Our Village Headman was one of them. As numerous ones visit him rgularly he made it a point to impress them that he is defenitely one who is blessed with this luxary. So every time when some one visit him he apply some cooked grains of rice on his moustache and come forward to impress that he had just enjoyed a good meal of rice.
Once a group of villagers droped in, on some kind of complains. As usual he came forward to meet the group with' rice attachment on his moustache.'
Right then his young son came running to the front of the house and said, "Thaathea, Thaathea that coconut shell you keep rice to place on your moustache before meeting people who come here was knocked by the cat and they are all now coward with ash near the fire place.