Hindi Jokes / Recent Jokes
A man lost his ring and reported the matter to the police. While police started their usual enquiries, the man, traced his ring from his pants. He immediately reported to police.
"What the hell are you talking about. We have already caught fourteen criminals and six of them have already confessed the theft," replied the police inspector.
Phone ki ganti baji.
Santa: Phone mere liye ho toh kehna mein ghar pe nahi hoon.
Jasmeet: Wo ghar pe hain.
Santa: Maine mana kiya tha ke…
Jasmeet: Phone mere liye tha!
Sardar talking on cell.
2nd Sardar: Kis se baat kar raho ho.
1st Sardar: Biwi se…
2nd Sardar: Itne… Pyaar se?
1st Sardar: Tumhari hai…
Firaq Gorakhpuri, the doyen of Urdu shairi, is often pestered by aspiring poets to write prefaces for their works. One such poet who was oversure of himself approached Firaq and by way of self-introduction said:' Firaq Sahib, my poems have been published in all the leading Urdu magazines and journals in the country. No doubt you must have read many of them.'
Firaq replied: All these magazines and journals you speak of also carry advertisements of medicines to cure piles; do you expect me to have read all these?' (Incidentally, Firaq suffered from piles and some of his jokes are about the pain they caused him in his fundament.)
Once at a mushaira, while other poets were reciting their compositions, the cord of Firaq's pajama snapped. When his turn came, he proceeded to recite while sitting down. The crowd clamoured.' Please get up and come to the mike.' Firaq stayed glued to his takia and replied,' Khawateen-o-Hazrat (ladies and gentlemen), the cord of my pajama has snapped. more...
Lady Doctor: Tum roz subah clinic ke bahar khade ho kar auraton ko kyon ghoorte ho?
Raman: Ji aap hi ne bahar likha hai… “Auraton ko dekhne ka samay 9am-11am. ”
Santa: Badda dukh hoya si teri wife di mout ki khabar sunker, wase hoya ki si?
Banta: Goli lagi si matthe vich.
Santa: Shukar rabb da ankh bach gai.
Mister Nene, his wife and his son were returning by train to home in Maharastra after taking a trip of South India. Mister Nene was occupying the lower berth, his wife had the middle berth and his son the top most berth in the train.
When the train stopped at one of the stations on the way, the son requested his father to buy him a cup of ice cream to which he readily agreed and got off the train. When they returned, they found that a Gujju bhai who couldn't understand Hindi or Marathi had occupied his son's berth.
Outraged, Mister Nene called the TT and asked him to help. TT was a South Indian who stated that he could not understand Hindi, Marathi or Gujarati so it would be better if Mister Nene explained the whole situation to him in English.
So Mr. Nene explained, "That man sleeping on top of my wife is not giving birth to my child."