Desi Jokes

Chota Miyan marries a naive young desi (country) londi (girl). On their Shaab-e-Aroosi (wedding night), he shows her his lund (penis) and tells her he's the only man to have such a thing.

Time passes by and after a few months, they are in bed one night when she grabs his organ & remarks, "You were lying when you told me you were the only man to have one of these. I've discovered that Ravana-Lingam from the Shudra Mohalla (neighbourhood) also has one as well."

Chota Miyan thinks quickly and replies, "Oh yes, that was a spare one I had, so I gave it to him."

"Oh Mehboob (darling)," she sighs. "Why did you have to give that Dravidian Admi (man) the biggest and best one ?"

Two Punjabi men, Santa Sahib & Banta Sahib, are visiting Madras. Desiring to buy condoms, they enter a medical store and approach the Tamilian shop-keeper.
"Oye! Santa, these chootiya (stupid) Madrasis don't know any Punjabi or Hindustani!" exclaims Banta in Punjabi just before they talk to the Tamilian. "So how will we tell him what we want?"
"Don't worry yaar! Sign language is a universal language! Just do as I do," replies Santa in Punjabi. With that, Santa pulls down his pyjamas, puts his fair penis onto the table & places a Rs 100 note next to it. The South Indian shop-keeper is amused but remains silent. Banta then likewise pulls down his pyjamas, puts his fair penis onto the table & places a Rs 100 note next to it. Grinning widely, the Tamil shop-keeper then pulls down his lungi and places his black penis onto the table, next to the genitals of the two Punjabi Sahibs.
The Dravidian laughs loudly as his one-foot long ebony more...

A Dravidian man falls asleep in a coconut grove. After a while a gigantic Kerala King Cobra slowly crawls along his legs & into his lungi (loin-cloth). Putting its head through an opening in front, the black serpent rises & spreads its fangs. Just as it is about to strike him in the face, the sleeping Dravidian man wakes up. Puzzled, he exclaims, "My horny South Indian King Cobra, I knew you were Big, Black & Dravidian! But from where did you get those bright green eyes ?"

Once a desi Indian fellow from some remote village happened to visit America alone.
Reaching there, he, clad in dhoti kurta, found most of the gentlemen dressed in suits. Unknowingly he just caught a man wearing a tie and asked pointing finger to the tie, 'what is this?', he replied 'It's a neck tie'.
The man then holding the desi man's dhoti from finger asked and what's this.
Desi consciously replied.'Oh its a back tie.'

A desi dies and goes to hell. There he finds that there is a different hell for each country. He goes first to the German hell and asks What do they do here?"
He is told "First they put you in an electric chair for an hour. Then they lay you on a bed of nails for another hour. Then the German devil comes in and whips you for the rest of the day."
The man does not like the sound of that at all, so he moves on. He checks out the USA hell as well as the Russian hell and many more. He discovers that they are all more or less the same as the German hell.
Then he comes to the Indian hell and finds that there is a very long line of people waiting to get in. Amazed he asks, "What do they do here?"
He is told "First they put you in anelectric chair for an hour. Then they lay you on a bed of nails for another hour. Then the Indian devil comes in and whips you for the rest of the day."
"But that is exactly the same as all the other more...