Western Jokes

The eastern lady who was all ready to take a horseback ride said to the cowboy, "Can you get me a nice gentle pony?" "Shore," said the cowboy. "What kind of a saddle do you want, English or western?" "Whats the difference?" asked the lady. "The western saddle has a horn on it," said the cowboy. "If the traffic is so thick here in the mountains that I need a horn on my saddle, I dont believe I want to ride."

How many country & western singers does it take to change a light bulb?
Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love she is with the new one, and one to go "Yeeeee-Hah! " and throw his hat in the air.

An oriental guy had just seen some western porn movies, a first in his lifetime. He felt so cool about those positions. So he ran home and wanted to share those ideas with his wife. He adjusted all the lamps, putting all kind of creams, and twisted his wife around. And he repeatedly asked "feel great, feel great...?" The wife was completely lost. She saw how disappointed he was and asked him, "What's wrong?" He answered that all western girls must moan in bed during intercourse. The wife said, if so... do give her the second chance. At the half of the second round, the wife started to shout: bed, bed, bed.....

Did you hear about the Western Kentucky professor who kissed the door goodbye and slammed his wife as he went by?

South Korea is gearing up for the World Cup by giving its toilets an urgent makeover. Officials are thinking big about the smallest room, lavishing expensive decor on lavatories and designing' themed' toilets in a bid to win the title of "Finest Rest Room in Seoul". Korea's "outhouse experience" has long been panned by visiting Westerners.

But the country has now launched the Rest Room movement and is determined visitors will be bowled over by the standard of its lavatories during World Cup 2002. Art shows have even been thrown in lavs, and there is now a guided tour of the city's top 50 conveniences. One top toilet is said to have an "urbane image of high class", with dressing tables, aromatic toilet paper and hair dryers.

Another has an art show, while a government-run loo is designed with a medieval theme and a "castle motif". Plants, colored lighting, ultra-high ceilings, cigarette machines and heavy steel ashtrays are more...