Honesty Jokes / Recent Jokes

A lawyer, named Thomas Strange, was shopping for a tombstone. After he had made his selection, the stonecutter asked him what inscription he would like on it.
"Here lies Thomas Strange, an honest man and a lawyer," responded the lawyer.
"Sorry, but I can't do that," replied the stonecutter. "In this state, it's against the law to bury two people in the same grave, and the authorities would be confused. However, I could put' Here lies an honest lawyer.'"
"But that won't let people know who it is" protested the lawyer.
"Sure they will," replied the stonecutter. "Everyone who reads it will think,' That's Strange!'"

Honesty is the key to a relationship. If you can fake that, you're in.

Honesty
"You`re in great shape," says the doctor. "You`re going to live to be 70."
"But I am 70," Issy replies.
"Nu," says the doctor, "did I lie?"

One evening a man walked into a fast-food chicken place and bought a nine-piece bucket of chicken. He took his chicken to the park for a romantic dinner under the moonlight with his lady. Upon reaching into the bucket, however, he received a surprise. Instead of chicken he discovered what was apparently the restaurant`s night deposit - some nine thousand bucks. The young man brought the bucket back to the store and asked for his chicken in exchange for the money. The manager, in awe of the young man`s honesty, asked for his name and told him he wanted to call the newspaper and the local news station to do a story on him. He would become a local hero, an example of honesty and morality that would inspire others! The hungry man shrugged it off, "My date`s waiting. I just want my chicken." The manager`s renewed amazement over the young man`s humility almost overwhelmed him. He begged to be allowed to tell the story on the news. At this the honest man became angry with the more...

Honesty is like an icicle;
once it melts, that's the end of it.

Honesty is the best policy, but insanity is a better defense.

Honesty
One day, a poor woodcutter was cutting a branch of a tree above a river when his axe fell into the river. When he began crying, God appeared and asked him, "Why are you crying?"
The woodcutter told him that he had dropped his axe into water.
God went down into the water and reappeared with a golden axe.
"Is this your axe?", God asked. The woodcutter said "No".
God again went down and came up with a silver axe.
"Is this your axe?" God asked. The woodcutter said "No".
God went down again and came up with an iron axe. "Is this your axe?", God asked. The woodcutter said, "Yes".
God was so pleased with the man`s honesty that he gave him all the three axes. The woodcutter went home happy.
Many months later, while the woodcutter was walking with his wife along the river, she fell into the river. When he began crying, God appeared and asked him, "Why are you more...