Honor Jokes / Recent Jokes

Q: What do you get if you put 100 lawyers in your basement?
A: A whine cellar.

Q: What do you call a lawyer gone bad?
A: Your honor.

Q: What do you call a judge gone bad?
A: Senator.

Q: Have you heard about the lawyers? word processor?
A: No matter what font you select, everything comes out in fine print.

Q: What’s the difference between a good lawyer and a great lawyer?
A: A good lawyer knows the law. A great lawyer knows the judge.

Q: When lawyers die, why don’t vultures them?
A: Even a vulture has taste.

Q: What do you call a lawyer with an I. Q. of 10?
A: A lawyer.

Q: What do you call a lawyer with an I. Q. of 50?
A: Your honor.

My honor student is also a black belt, so bring on your bully!

Q: What do you call 47 people sitting around a TV watching the Playoffs?
A: The Dallas Cowboys

Q: How many players did the Cowboys dress for their last game?
A:
22. The rest dressed themselves.

Q: What's Jerry Jones' biggest concern?
A: Does bail money count against the salary cap?

Q: What do you call a drug ring in Dallas?
A: A huddle.

Q: Four Dallas Cowboys are in a car. Who's driving?
A: The police.

Q: Why can't Michael Irvin get into a huddle on the field anymore?
A: It is a parole violation for him to associate with known Felons.

I understand Chicago is trying to sign Michael Irvin. They got rid of the refrigerator and now they want a coke machine.

The Dallas newspapers reported yesterday that Texas Stadium is going to take out the artificial turf because the Cowboys play better on "grass".

The Dallas Cowboys adopted a new "Honor System". more...

Q: What do they call a drug ring in Dallas?
A: A huddle.
Q: There are 4 Dallas Cowboys in a car, who's driving?
A: The police.
Q: Why can't Michael Irvin be in the Cowboy huddle anymore?
A: It's a parole violation for him to associate with known felons.
The team doctor said because of Michael Irvin's fractured wrist, it'll be 6 - 8 weeks before he can video tape a team mate having sex.
The Chicago Bears are trying to trade for Michael Irvin. They got rid of the "Refrigerator" and now they want a "Coke Machine".
It was reported today that the artificial turf in Texas Stadium is being replaced because the Cowboys play much better on "grass".
The Dallas Cowboys have adopted a new "Honor System". "Yes, your Honor", "No, your Honor".
The Cowboys had a 12 and 5 season this year. 12 arrests and 5 convictions.
In a move to strengthen their defense, the Dallas Cowboys today hired more...

A Columbia lawyer was well into a lengthy cross-examination of a witness, stopped and said: "Your honor, a juror is asleep."
The Judge ruled: "You put him to sleep! YOU wake him up!"

Tennessee state Senator Ophelia Ford introduced a bill to honor Justin Timberlake, the biggest thing to come out of Tennessee since Jack Daniels. Which is, coincidentally, what she was drinking when she wrote the resolution.

Soup manufacturers announced today that they will be stocking America's shelves this week with "Clinton Soup," that will honor one of the nation's most distinguished men. It consists primarily of a small weenie in hot water.
Chrysler Corporation is adding a new car to its line to honor Bill Clinton. The Dodge Drafter will begin production in Canada this year.
When Clinton was asked what he thought about foreign affairs, he replied: "I don't know, I never had one."
American Indians have nicknamed Bill Clinton as "Walking Eagle" because he is so full of crap he can't fly.
Clinton only lacks three things to become one of America's finest leaders: Integrity, vision, and wisdom.
Clinton is doing the work of three men: Larry, Curly, and Moe.
Revised judicial oath: "I solemnly swear to tell the truth as I know it, the whole truth as I believe it to be, and nothing but what I think you need to know."