Hostess Jokes / Recent Jokes
For the first time U RAWANA got into a Air Ceylon plane to go abroad, as the usual flight delay U RAWANA fell asleep on the cosy seat. After short while U RAWANA woked up and ran towards the main door tried to open that. The air hostess shouted " wait,,, wait" But our man misunderstood that air hostess is asking his " weight"and jumped thro the door shouting "its 150 lbs"
When my wife and I showed up at a very popular restaurant, it was crowded. My wife went up to the hostess (who was blonde) and asked, "Will it be long?"
The hostess, ignoring her, kept on writing in her book. My wife again asked "How much of a wait?"
The blonde looked up, "About ten minutes."
A short time later, the blonde got on the loudspeaker, and announced "Willette B. Long, your table is ready."
SEATTLE'S TURKEY DAY ETIQUETTE
It's been 145 years since the first white settlers landed at Alki Beach at Thanksgiving time, took one look at the overcast skies and the sodden, rain-soaked West Seattle terrain, and burst into tears.
(History, alas, doesn't record the response of the Native Americans when they spotted those tear-drenched settlers. But they probably were too polite to laugh out loud.)
In the intervening years, the first residents and the settlers have worked out the rules for Thanksgiving, Puget Sound style. Here they are, recently updated by an ad hoc Turkey Day committee:
DRESS CODE. Thanksgiving Day guests will arrive wearing Seattle tuxes: clean jeans, turtleneck sweaters and down jackets with weathered ski-lift tags. Hiking boots are optional.
CONVERSATION'S GAMBIT. Topics will include: 1) the election; 2) previous elections; and, 3) the next election. Several arguments will ensue before the host or hostess more...
Dr Gordon, a prominent psychiatrist, was a guest at a chic gathering and his blonde hostess naturally broached the subject in which he was most at ease. "Would you mind telling me, Doctor," she asked, "how you detect a mental deficiency in somebody who appears completely normal?""Nothing is easier," Dr Gordon replied. "You ask him a simple question which everyone should answer with no trouble. If he hesitates, that puts you on the right track.""What sort of question?" asked the hostess."Well, you might ask him,' Captain Cook made three trips around the world and died during one of them. Which one?' "The hostess thought a moment, then said with a nervous laugh, "You wouldn't happen to have another example would you? I must confess I don't know much about history."
A Jet Ran In To Some Turbulent Weather. To Keep Passengers Calm, The Air Hostess Brought Out The Beverage Carts."I'd Like A Soda " Said The Passenger In The Front Row. Moving Along, The Air Hostess Asked The Man Behind Her If He Would Like Something."Yes I Would," He Replied. "Give Me Whatever The Pilot Is Drinking!".
A priest was asked to dinner by one of his parishioners. When he sat down at the table, he noticed that the dishes werethe dirtiest that he had ever seen in his life." Were these dishes ever washed?" he asked his hostess, running his fingers over the grit and grime. She replied, "Of course they were cleaned Father." "They're as clean as soap and water could get them." He felt a bit apprehensive, but blessed the food anyway and they all started eating. The meal was delicious and he paid his compliments in spite the dirty dishes. When dinner was over, the hostess took the dishes outside and yells -"Here Soap! Here Water!"