Impressive Jokes

Way back in the time of the samurai, there was a powerful emperor.This emperor needed a new head samurai. So, he sent out a message to everybody he knew for them to send a message to who they knew, and so forth.A year passes, and only three people show up: a Japanese samurai, a Chinese samurai, and a Jewish samurai. The emperor asks the Japanese samurai to come in and demonstrate why he should be head samurai.The Japanese samurai opens up a matchbox, and out pops a little fly.WHOOOOOSH. The fly drops dead on the ground in 2 pieces! The emperor says, "That is very impressive!"Then the emperor asks the Chinese samurai to come in and demonstrate why he should be head samurai. The Chinese samurai opens up a matchbox and out pops a little fly. WHOOOOOOSH. WOOOOOOOSH.The fly drops dead on the ground in 4 pieces! The emperor says, "That is really impressive!"Then the emperor asks the Jewish samurai to come in and demonstrate why he should be head samurai.The Jewish more...

Way back in the time of the samurai, there was a powerful emperor.
This emperor needed a new head samurai. So, he sent out a message to everybody he knew for them to send a message to who they knew, and so forth.
A year passes, and only three people show up: a Japanese samurai, a Chinese samurai, and a Jewish samurai. The emperor asks the Japanese samurai to come in and demonstrate why he should be head samurai.
The Japanese samurai opens up a matchbox, and out pops a little fly.
WHOOOOOSH. The fly drops dead on the ground in 2 pieces!
The emperor says, "That is very impressive!"
Then the emperor asks the Chinese samurai to come in and demonstrate why he should be head samurai. The Chinese samurai opens up a matchbox and out pops a little fly. WHOOOOOOSH. WOOOOOOOSH.
The fly drops dead on the ground in 4 pieces!
The emperor says, "That is really impressive!"
Then the emperor asks the Jewish samurai to come in and demonstrate why more...

The proud owner of an impressive new clock was showing it off to a friend.' This clock,' he said,' will go for 14 days without winding.'' Really?' replied his friend,' And how long will it go if you do wind it? '

Back in the time of the Samurai there was a powerful emperor who needed a new head Samurai so he sent out a declaration throughout the country that he was searching for one. A year passed and only 3 people showed up. The emperor asked the first Samurai to come in and demonstrate why he should be head Samurai. The first Samurai opened a match box and out pops a little fly. Whoosh goes his sword and the fly drops dead on the ground in 2 pieces. The emperor exclaimed, "That is very impressive!" The emperor then asked the second Samurai to come in and demonstrate. The second Samurai also opened a match box and out pops a fly. Whoosh whoosh goes his sword. The fly drops dead on the ground in 4 pieces. The emperor exclaimed, "That is really very impressive!" The emperor then had the third Samurai demonstrate why he should be the head Samurai. The third Samurai also opened a match box and out pops a fly. His flashing sword goes whoooooooossshhh whoooooooossshhh more...

The proud owner of an impressive new clock was showing it off to a friend. This clock, he said, will go for 14 days without winding. Really? replied his friend, And how long will it go if you do wind it?