Investment Jokes / Recent Jokes

Very Short Books...1) Outdoor activities in Chernobyl2) Hot Scenic Real-estate opportunities on top of Mt St. Helens3) Investment opportunities in worm futures for the deceased4) Ballerina lessons for men with size 13 or larger feet5) Defensive Driving tips for the Blind6) Contraceptive tips for Nuns7) Delicious Beef Recipes for Hindus8) Mutual Fund Investment strategies for compulsive gamblers9) Cooking with Pork Fat for Vegetarians10) GreenPeace Guide for Buying Quality Baby Seal coats11) GreenPeace Guide to Preparing Fast & Easy Whale Dishes12) Jewish and Arab Friendship Customs13) Human Rights organizations in Libya14) Democracy Debate clubs in Cuba15) Applying for Tibetan Vendors Permits16) Applying for Flight Clearance over The White House17) Guide to Redneck Gay Bars18) Guide to NeoNazis Jewish Friendship Centers19) Famous Native American Judges, Senators and Presidents20) Famous Black Canadian Hockey Players21) Famous Hillbilly Physics22) Guide to apply for Pan Handling Permit more...

The most respected name in bridge sale is about to present an offer that no self respecting bridge collector can ignore. The Bradley Bridge Exchange is proud to introduce the Commemorative Bridge Series. Even if you have never collected bridges before this unique investment opportunity should interest you.
The Bradley Bridge Exchange has been selling quality collectable bridges for fifty years. Now through this once in a lifetime Internet offer, you can purchase famous bridges.
Think about it, EVERYONE needs bridges: to go to work, walk across, jump from, get mugged under and to throw rocks from.
Not all bridges go up in value, the Bradley Bridge Exchange guarantees that your own personalized bridge will retain its minimum value for at least one full year.
The famous Golden Gate Bridge was originally offered through The Bradley Bridge Exchange for a mere 35 dollars. In the 57 times it has since been re-sold, its value has increased to an astounding 10 million dollars! more...

Galbraith's Law of Human Nature: Faced with the choice between changing one's mind and proving that there is no need to do so, almost everybody gets busy on the proof.
Gerrold's Laws of Infernal Dynamics: 1. An object in motion will always be headed in the wrong direction. 2. An object at rest will always be in the wrong place. 3. The energy required to change either one of these states will always be more than you wish to expend, but never so much as to make the task totally impossible.
Gilb's Laws Of Unreliability: 1) At the source of every error which is blamed on the computer you will find at least two human errors, including the error of blaming it on the computer. 2) Any system which depends on human reliability is unreliable. 3) Udetectable errors are infinite in variety, in contrast to detectable errors, which by definition are limited. 4) Investment in reliability will increase until it exceeds the probable cost of errors, or until someone insists on getting some more...

President Bush said clients shouldn't be concerned by
all these bank closings. If the bank is closed, you just use the ATM, he said.

George Bush said that he is saddened to hear about the demise of Lehman brothers. His thoughts at this time go out to their mother as losing one son is hard but losing two is a tragedy.

The problem with investment bank balance sheets is that on the left side nothing is right and on the right side nothing is left.

There are 30 billion prime numbers below 700 billion. The rest are all subprime.

How do you define optimism? A banker who irons 5 shirts on a Sunday.

What do you call 12 investment bankers at the bottom of the ocean? A good start.

Why are all MBAs going back to school? To ask for their money back.

For Geography students: What's the capital of Iceland?
Answer: About Three Pounds Fifty...

If you want to gamble, go to Las Vegas. If you want to trade in more...

Very Short Books...
1) Outdoor activities in Chernobyl 2) Hot Scenic Real-estate opportunities on top of Mt St. Helens 3) Investment opportunities in worm futures for the deceased 4) Ballerina lessons for men with size 13 or larger feet 5) Defensive Driving tips for the Blind 6) Contraceptive tips for Nuns 7) Delicious Beef Recipes for Hindus 8) Mutual Fund Investment strategies for compulsive gamblers 9) Cooking with Pork Fat for Vegetarians 10) GreenPeace Guide for Buying Quality Baby Seal coats 11) GreenPeace Guide to Preparing Fast & Easy Whale Dishes 12) Jewish and Arab Friendship Customs 13) Human Rights organizations in Libya 14) Democracy Debate clubs in Cuba 15) Applying for Tibetan Vendors Permits 16) Applying for Flight Clearance over The White House 17) Guide to Redneck Gay Bars 18) Guide to NeoNazis Jewish Friendship Centers 19) Famous Native American Judges, Senators and Presidents 20) Famous Black Canadian Hockey Players 21) Famous Hillbilly Physics 22) Guide to more...

Very Short Books...
1) Outdoor activities in Chernobyl
2) Hot Scenic Real-estate opportunities on top of Mt St. Helens
3) Investment opportunities in worm futures for the deceased
4) Ballerina lessons for men with size 13 or larger feet
5) Defensive Driving tips for the Blind
6) Contraceptive tips for Nuns
7) Delicious Beef Recipes for Hindus
8) Mutual Fund Investment strategies for compulsive gamblers
9) Cooking with Pork Fat for Vegetarians
10) GreenPeace Guide for Buying Quality Baby Seal coats
11) GreenPeace Guide to Preparing Fast & Easy Whale Dishes
12) Jewish and Arab Friendship Customs
13) Human Rights organizations in Libya
14) Democracy Debate clubs in Cuba
15) Applying for Tibetan Vendors Permits
16) Applying for Flight Clearance over The White House
17) Guide to Redneck Gay Bars
18) Guide to NeoNazis Jewish Friendship Centers
19) Famous Native American Judges, Senators and Presidents
20) Famous more...

Attention Bridge Buyers
The most respected name in bridge sale is about to present an offer that no self respecting bridge collector can ignore. The Bradley Bridge Exchange is proud to introduce the Commemorative Bridge Series. Even if you have never collected bridges before this unique investment opportunity should interest you.
The Bradley Bridge Exchange has been selling quality collectable bridges for fifty years. Now through this once in a lifetime Internet offer, you can purchase famous bridges.
Think about it, EVERYONE needs bridges: to go to work, walk across, jump from, get mugged under and to throw rocks from.
Not all bridges go up in value, the Bradley Bridge Exchange guarantees that your own personalized bridge will retain its minimum value for at least one full year.
The famous Golden Gate Bridge was originally offered through The Bradley Bridge Exchange for a mere 35 dollars. In the 57 times it has since been re-sold, its value has increased to an more...