Issue Jokes / Recent Jokes

The September issue of "Playboy" magazine will feature a six-page spread of Paris Hilton look-a-like Natalie Reid.
Following "Playboy's" lead, the September issue of "Architectural Digest" will feature a spread of house look-a-like Ruben Studdard.

Beyonce is on the cover of the latest Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue, and is very excited to be part of all that masturbation.

Q: How many Arians does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Just the one. You want to make something of it, eh?

Q: How many congressmen does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Five hundred and thirty-five, but only if the following conditions are met: The light bulb will not be changed in an election year. A committee will study the light-bulb situation for at least a year. Taxes will have to be raised. A fair and proportionate number of the light-bulb changers will be from minority groups. No Social Security funds will be used to change the bulb. Each state and congressional district will share in the benefits of changing the light bulb. The blame for the failure of the present bulb will be assigned to the other party. The new bulb will be twice as bright as the old bulb. Because the new bulb is twice as bright as the old bulb, it will cost 130 times as much. A Blue Ribbon Panel will investigate the light-bulb failures and issue a mega-page report to the congress. more...

"We`ve tripled the amount of money - I believe it`s from $50 million up to $195 million available." -George W. Bush, Lima, Peru, March 23, 2002
"We`ve got pockets of persistent poverty in our society, which I refuse to declare defeat - I mean, I refuse to allow them to continue on. And so one of the things that we`re trying to do is to encourage a faith-based initiative to spread its wings all across America, to be able to capture this great compassionate spirit." -George W. Bush, O`Fallon, Mo., Mar. 18, 2002
"I understand that the unrest in the Middle East creates unrest throughout the region." -George W. Bush, Washington, D. C., March 13, 2002
"There`s nothing more deep than recognizing Israel`s right to exist. That`s the most deep thought of all.. .. I can`t think of anything more deep than that right." -George W. Bush, Washington, D. C., March 13, 2002
"He [Japanese Prime Minister Junichiro Koizumi] said I want to more...