Jane Jokes / Recent Jokes
Tarzan had been living alone in his jungle kingdom for 30 years with only apes for company, and suitably shaped holes in trees for sex. Jane, a reporter, came to Africa in search of this legendary figure.
Deep in the wilds she came to a clearing and discovered Tarzan vigorously thrusting into a jungle oak. She watched in awe for a while.
Finally, overcome by this display of animal passion Jane came out into the open and offered herself to him. As she reclined on the wild grass Tarzan ran up to her and gave her a big kick in the crotch.
In pain she screamed' What the hell did you do that for?'
Tarzan replied,' Always check for squirrels.'
Here's a list of some cute letters kids have written to God:
Dear GOD:
Instead of letting people die and having to make new ones, why don't You just keep the ones You have? - Jane
Dear GOD:
Maybe Cain and Abel would not kill each other so much if they had their own rooms. It works with my brother. - Larry
Dear GOD:
If You watch me in church on Sunday, I'll show You my new shoes. - Mickey
Dear GOD:
I bet it is very hard for You to love all of everybody in the whole world. There are only 4 people in our family and I can never do it. - Nan
Dear GOD:
In school they told us what You do. Who does it when You are on vacation? - Jane
Dear GOD:
I read the Bible. What does "beget" mean? Nobody will tell me. - Love, Alison
Dear GOD:
Are You really invisible or is it just a trick? - Lucy
Dear GOD:
Is it true my father won't get in Heaven if he uses his bowling words in the house? Anita
Dear GOD:
Did You mean for the more...
Dick and Jane were arguing furiously over the breakfast table.' Oh you're so stupid!' shouted Dick.' Dick!' said their father,' that's quite enough of that! Now say you're sorry.'' OK,' said Dick.' Jane, I'm sorry you're stupid.'
After working together for a while, Dick and Jane's office romance blossomed, and they really developed the 'hots' for each other. One day, they seize the opportunity to sneak into a supply closet to consummate their lust.
Dick finds Jane very 'tight', and difficult to 'enter', but finally succeeds.
When they are finished, Dick says to her, "If I had known you were a virgin, I would have taken more time!"
To which Jane replies "If I'd have known you had more time, I would have taken off my pantyhose!"
After working together for a while, Dick and Jane's office romance blossomed, and they really developed the hots for each other. One day, they seize the opportunity to sneak into a supply closet to consummate their lust. Dick finds Jane very tight, and difficult to enter, but finally succeeds. When they are finished, Dick says to her, "If I had known you were a virgin, I would have taken more time!" To which Jane replies "If I'd known you had more time, I would have taken off my pantyhose!"
Q: If Tarzan and Jane were blondes, what would Cheetah be?
A: The smartest of the three.
' Jane's' job includes opening mail for her employer. Junk mail too.
Last week there was a catalogue from a company that sells promotional material related specifically to anniversaries. With it was a covering letter congratulating them on their tenth year in business, coming up this spring.
Yea, right.
The institution' Jane' works for was founded in 1889.