Japan Jokes / Recent Jokes

The New York Times reports that Toyota has overtaken Ford in U.S. vehicle sales.
"The Japanese are killing us," said a Ford spokesman, "again."

An inside source says that Mr. Toyota's testimoy could be quite lengthy as he tends to be long-winded. The source says that once Toyota gets started on a topic he has a hard time stopping.

In related news, Chrysler has also issued a nationwide recall over a leaky trunk. A Chrysler official will contact the owner tomorrow.

The MLB All-Stars swept their tour of Japan. It was especially difficult to scout the series, since no one from America could tell any of the Japanese players apart.

A sewage treatment facility in Japan has recorded a higher gold yield from sewer sludge than can be found at some of the world's best mines. All over Japan, people are now paying more attention when someone says, "I just shit a brick!"

Japan has never really invented anything. They take our technology and make it better. They did it with computers and now they're doing it with airplanes. Engineers at the Tokyo Institute of Technology have developed a plane that flies on nothing but AA batteries. That's right, AA batteries. Now you can listen to a CD player or fly a plane.
I guess soon they'll start working on a plane with a giant rubberband you twirl to make it take off. Then a plane made from paper. Just fold it into the shape of a plane and have a sumo wrestler throw it as far as possible. Someone should tell them about stoves so they can start cooking their fish.

Take heart, America. Three monkey wrenches have been thrown into Japan's well-oiled economic machine. It's only a mater of time before that powerful engine of productivity begins to sputter and fail.

What could cause such a sharp turnaround? High interest rates? Increased unemployment? Lower productivity? No, it's something much more economically debilitating - and permanent.

Three American lawyers have become the first foreign attorneys permitted to practice law in Japan. What's more, two of them are from New York!

The decline has begun.

Japan has one attorney for every 10, 000 residents, compared to the U. S. ratio of one attorney for every 390 residents. For every 100 attorneys trained in Japan, there are 1, 000 enginerrs. In the United States, that ratio is reversed.

But a law that became effective on April 1 permits foreigners to practice in Japan for the first time since 1955. Already, an additional 20 American and six more...