Jerk Jokes

cow1 says: "moooooo"
cow2 says: "JERK,"i was gonna say that"

Jerks by Patrick Hanifin (Reproduced without permission from the Humor Archives)
Now get this. I was sitting at my desk, when I remembered a phone call I had to make. I found
the number and dialed it. A man answered nicely saying, "Hello?"
I politely said, "This is Patrick Hanifin and could I please speak to Robin Carter?" Suddenly
the phone was slammed down on me! I couldn't believe that anyone could be that rude.
I tracked down Robin's correct number and called her. She had transposed the last two digits.
After I hung up with Robin, I spotted the wrong number still lying there on my desk. I decided
to call it again. When the same person once more answered, I yelled "You're a jerk!" and hung
up.
Next to his phone number I wrote the word "Jerk," and put it in my desk drawer. Every couple of
weeks, when I was paying bills, or had a really bad day, I'd call him up. He'd answer, and then
I'd more...

After the annual office party, John woke up with a headache, cotton-mouthed, and utterly unable to recall the events of the preceding evening. After a trip to the bathroom he was able to make his way downstairs, where his wife was preparing breakfast. "Gina," he moaned, "tell me what went on last night. Was it as bad as I think?" "Even worse," she declared, her voice dripping with scorn. "You made a complete jerk of yourself, succeeded in antagonizing the entire board of directors, and insulted the president of the company to his face!" "He's an jerk, piss on him." "You did," Gina informed him. "And he fired you." "Well, screw him!," said John. "I did. You're back at work on Monday!"

One morning, a parish priest was opening his mail.
He took a single sheet of paper out of an envelope and unfolded it. Looking at the paper, he found that only one word had been written... 'JERK'.
At mass the following Sunday, he announced to his congregation, "I have known many people who have written letters and have forgotten to sign their name. However, this week I received a letter from someone who signed their name, but forgot to write a letter... "

there were three boys named poop jerk and maners they were riding there bikes and poop kept falling of maners kept helping him. a man drove up to jerk and said whats your name jerk jerk said the man said what he said jerk! the man said wheres your maners.jerk said in the backyard picking up poop