Jerry Seinfeld Jokes

A cook book author has filed a lawsuit against Seinfeld`s wife for copying her work and against Jerry for comments made after he ate it.,,,Well it`s not slander if it taste like crap.

The other night my girlfriend and I are watching Seinfeld, and the episode happens to be The Gymnast. Then comes that one line where the gymnast tells Jerry of what she'd heard about comedians and their supposed...legendary sexual prowess. Ultimately she tells Jerry: "You may tell jokes, Mr. Seinfeld, but you are no comedian."
I turn to my girlfriend: "So, uh...am I a comedian?"
Her response: "Honey, if you never told another joke in your life, you'd still be the greatest comedian I've ever known."
Ladies, I hope you were taking notes. Because that is how you get your man to take out the trash.

Jerry and George convince Kramer to take part in their racist show.

Jerry Seinfeld was involved in a rollover car wreck in the Hamptons.

He later told police, "I should have known that the brakes would break. I mean, they're called brakes. When I'm driving, I don't need irony. I need to stop. I mean, come on, what's the deal?"

Have you ever noticed that when you get your civil rigthts violated by the LAPD you get a beating while someone is video taping, whereas when you get your civil rights violated by the NYPD you just get shot dead?
What's up with that?
Season 7 now available on DVD.