Kiwi Jokes

This aussie caught this Kiwi having a bit of fun with a sheep... "Mate", the aussie said, "Over there we shear them".The kiwi replied, "Mate, I'm not shearing this with innyone"

This aussie caught this Kiwi having a bit of fun with a sheep....." Mate", the aussie said, "Over there we shear them". The kiwi replied, "Mate, I'm not shearing this with innyone"

A Kiwi was hoping to immigrate to Australia. Upon arriving in Australia, he was questioned by a customs officer, “What is your business in Australia? ” “I wish to immigrate, ” was the Kiwi’s reply. The customs officer then asked, “Do you have a conviction record? ” Confused, the Kiwi then replied, “I didn’t think you still needed one. ”

An Aussie bloke is having a quiet drink in a bar and leans over to the big guy next to him and says, 'Do you wanna hear a Kiwi joke?
The big guy replies, 'Well mate, before you tell that joke, you should know something. I'm 1.90 m tall, 125 kg and I played as a forward for the All Blacks."
"The guy next to me is 1.85 m, weighs 115 kg and he's an ex-All Black lock."
"Next to him is a bloke who's 2 m tall, weighs 120 kg and he's a current All Black second rower. Now do you still want to tell that Kiwi joke?"
The first bloke says, "Nah, not if I'm going to have to explain it three times."

A Kiwi was hoping to immigrate to Australia. Upon arriving in Australia, he was questioned by a customs officer, "What is your business in Australia?"

"I wish to immigrate," was the Kiwi's reply.

The customs officer then asked, "Do you have a conviction record?"

Confused, the Kiwi then replied, "I didn't think you still needed one."