Laden Jokes / Recent Jokes

MONDAYS:
8:00 - "Husseinfeld"
8:30 - "Mad About Everything"
9:00 - "Suddenly Sanctions"
9:30 - "The Brian Benben Bin Laden Show"
10:00 - "Allah McBeal"
TUESDAYS:
8:00 - "Wheel of Terror and Fortune"
8:30 - "The Price is Right If Osama Says Its Right"
9:00 - "Children Are Forbidden From Saying The Darndest Things"
9:30 - "Afganistans Wackiest Public Execution Bloopers"
10:00 - "Buffy The Yankee Imperialist Dog Slayer"
WEDNESDAYS:
8:00 - "U.S. Military Secrets Revealed"
8:30 - "Bowling For Food"
9:00 - "Two Guys, a Girl, and a Pita Bread"
9:30 - "Just Shoot Everyone"
10:00 - "Veilwatch"
THURSDAYS:
8:00 - "Matima Loves Chachi"
8:30 - "M*U*S*T*A*S*H"
9:00 - "Veronicas Closet Full of Long, Black, Shapeless Dresses and more...

Osama Bin Laden found a bottle on the beach and picked it up. Suddenly, a female genie rose from the bottle and with a smile said "Master, may I grant you one wish?""Hey, don't you know who I am? I don't need no woman givin' me nuthin"' barked Bin Laden.The genie pleaded "but Master, I must grant you a wish or I will be returned to this bottle forever." Osama thought a moment, then, grumbling about the inconvenience of it all, he said "Okay, okay, I wanna wake up with three white women in my bed in the morning, so just do it!"Giving the genie an evil glare, he screamed, "Now leave me alone!" The annoyed genie said "So be it!" and disappeared back in to the bottle. The next morning, Bin Laden woke up in bed with Lorena Bobbitt, Tonya Harding and Hillary Clinton. His penis was gone, his leg was broken and he had no health insurance.

"If you meet Osama Bin Laden - sucker punch the bastard"
"Special hotline to report anyone who looks 'shifty'"
"Offer Taliban free HBO, instead of cable guy send Jackie Chan"
"Two words: spy monkeys"
"Go to every K-Mart and announce over P.A.: 'Will Osama Bin Laden report to the manager's office?'"
"What are we waiting for - call Batman"
"Give terrorists brightly wrapped fruitcake, but inside there's a skunk!"
"Make Taliban leaders easier to spot by sending them all bright orange hats"
"Fight terrorism with love!" (the guy who suggested this was beaten to a pulp by an angry mob)
"Do another 'Hands Across America' - that worked before"
©MMI, CBS Worldwide Inc.

One day Hitler, Saddam, and Bin Laden went to a gate to see if their going HEAVEN orHELL Hitler told this one guy that he started a war. Then the guy said to go to the left. Then Saddam said bush wanted me to start a war. Then the guy said ok go to the right. Then Bin Laden said i accidently blew up a plain. Then the guy said go right. Hitler said hey why are they going to heaven? then the guy said because they didnt do anything bad. Then Hitler said can i go warm up their place?

George Bush goes to a primary school to give a speech.
After his talk he offers question time.
One little boy puts up his hand and George asks him what his name is. "Bob".
"And what is your question, Bob?"
"I have 3 questions.
First, Why did the USA invade Iraq without the support of the UN?
Second, Why are you President when Kerry got more votes?
And third, What happened to Osama Bin Laden?
Just then the bell rings for recess. George Bush informs the kiddies that they will continue after recess.
When they resume George says, "OK, where were we?
Oh that's right
- question time. Who has a question?"
A different little boy puts up his hand. George points him out and asks him what his name is. "Steve"
"And what is your question, Steve?"
"I have 5 questions.
First, Why did the USA invade Iraq without the support of the UN?
Second, Why are you more...

Little Melissa comes home from first grade and tells her father that they learned about the history of Valentine's Day. "Since Valentine's Day is for a Christian saint and we're Jewish," she asks, "will God get mad at me for giving someone a valentine?" Melissa's father thinks a bit, then says "No, I don't think God would get mad. Who do you want to give a valentine to?""Osama Bin Laden," she says. "Why Osama Bin Laden," her father asks in shock. "Well," she says, "I thought that if a little American Jewish girl could have enough love to give Osama a valentine, he might start to think that maybe we're not all bad, and maybe start loving people a little bit. And if other kids saw what I did and sent valentines to Osama, he'd love everyone a lot. And then he'd start going all over the place to tell everyone how much he loved them and how he didn't hate anyone anymore."Her father's heart swells and he looks at his more...

Q. What do Fred Flintstone and Osama Bin Laden have in common?
A. They both look out their caves and see rubble.