Mango Jokes / Recent Jokes

There was a sardarji who was down on his luck. In order to raise some money he decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom. He went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree, and told him, "i've kidnapped you." the sardarji then wrote a note saying: "i've kidnapped your kid.
Tomorrow morning, put $10, 000 in a paper bag & put it beneath the mango tree next to the slide on the north side of the city play ground". signed, "a sardarji". The sardarji then pinned the note to the kid's shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents.
The next morning the sardarji checked, and sure enough a paper bag was sitting beneath the mango tree. The sardarji opened up the bag and found the $10, 000 with a note saying, "how could you do this to a fellow sardarji? !"

A RESIDENT of Tezpur (Assam) visited Chandigarh for the first time. She found it clean, green, pollution-free, but very dull. Wandering round its sparsely populated shopping centres, she chanced upon a mother and daughter shop-window gazing. The girl was pretty and evidently eager to enter beauty contests. Being Punjabi she could not resist eating chaat and ice-cream as they went along. It was a warm day, so she began clamouring for a cool drink.' Mummy, I want an ice-cold mango juice,' she wailed.
'No mango-shango for you,' reprimanded her mother,' you will become fat and that will be the end of your ambitions. Who will want to marry a motee kudee?'
The girl persisted, T am very thirsty. One mango juice will do me no harm.'
Her mother came out with the final argument.' You see that Bengalan Sushmita Sen! She only eats madih. ee and chaaval (fish and rice) and became a Miss Universe. You should follow her example.'

You Know Someone Is From Hawaii If...
They have a separate circuit breaker for their rice cooker.
Only NOW they know that cilantro is the same as Chinese parsley.
They measure the water for the rice by the knuckle of their index finger. They know which market sells poi on which days.
They know that Char Sung Hut is closed on Tuesday.
They can handle shoyu with green mango, li hing mui gummy bears, raw egg on hot rice, and pearl tea (carnation milk in hot water with sugar) with creme crackers.
Their refrigerator has half-empty jar of mango chutney from the `95 Punahou Carnival.
The condiments at the table are shoyu, ketchup, chili peppah watah, and kimchee. Also, takuwan, Hawaiian salt, slice onion, and pickle onion. They go to Maui and their luggage home includes potato chips, manju, cream puffs, and guri guri for omiyage.
They think the four food groups are starch (rice), Spam, fried food, and fruit punch.
A balanced meal has three more...