Mccartney Jokes / Recent Jokes

A lady was a huge Paul MCCartney fan and wanted a tattoo of him on the inside of her thigh. She went to the parlour and told the guy what she wanted.
He says: "OK, take your skirt and underwear off and sit in the chair with your legs apart".
She did that and he started on the tattoo. Pretty soon he's done, blows off the dust and admires his work.
"Who the heck's that?" she says.
"It's Paul McCartney", he replies.
"Doesn't look like him at all" says she. "Now get it right or I'll report you".
So the tattooist starts on the other thigh. Really trying hard to do a better job. Finally he's done, blows off the dust and feels pretty good.
The woman is pissed off "No way that's Paul Mccartney" she says.
"It bloody well is" says the man. "Listen I'll get a second opinion"
He goes out of his store and grabs the first person he sees. The guy is a drunk who's been stumbling along more...

A lady was a huge Paul MCCartney fan and wanted a tattoo of him on the inside of her thigh. She went to the parlour and told the guy what she wanted.He says: "OK, take your skirt and underwear off and sit in the chair with your legs apart".She did that and he started on the tattoo. Pretty soon he's done, blows off the dust and admires his work."Who the heck's that?" she says."It's Paul McCartney", he replies."Doesn't look like him at all" says she. "Now get it right or I'll report you".So the tattooist starts on the other thigh. Really trying hard to do a better job. Finally he's done, blows off the dust and feels pretty good.The woman is pissed off "No way that's Paul Mccartney" she says."It bloody well is" says the man. "Listen I'll get a second opinion"He goes out of his store and grabs the first person he sees. The guy is a drunk who's been stumbling along the sidewalk. The tattooist drags the drunk more...

 Paul McCartney dedicated a few songs last night which I thought was nice. He sang songs for his pals George Harrison and John Lennon then dedicated My Love to Linda but the song that brought a tear to my eye was a new one he dedicated to Heather "Die you money hungry selfish bitch!"

The McCartney kids are at the family ranch anxiouslyawaiting news of their mother. Paul emerges from his wife's bedroom. "Kid's...... there's good news and bad news." "The bad news is your mother's strength and will tolive has been sucked away by her awful disease and shedied a few moments ago" "The good news is.... It's steak and chips for dinner!"

Paul McCartney's soon-to-be ex, Heather Mills, said that being called a gold digger was, "Worse than losing my leg." Upon hearing the news, the motorcyclist who ran over Mills' leg said, "Um, so we're cool now, right?"