Mexico Jokes / Recent Jokes

A tourist was introduced to an Indian in New Mexico who was said to have a perfect memory. Skeptical, the tourist asked, "What did you have for breakfast on September 10, 1943?" The Indian answered, "Eggs." The man scoffed, "Everyone eats eggs for breakfast. He's a phony."Thirteen years later the traveler's train stopped again in the small New Mexico town, and he saw the same Indian sitting on the train platform.The tourist went up and said jovially, "How!" The Indian answered, "Scrambled."

In Mexico, there's a six-year-old boy fighting to get into medical school. He's been studying on his own and is considered an expert on osteoporosis, diabetes and anemia.
Don't tell me Mexicans don't work harder than we do. At age six I didn't even know how old I was.
This kid started kindergarten by the 1st trimester. His schooling went from nap time and cookies to trying to get some on prom night... That's what half a bottle of tequila and a joint will do to a 45-pound, six-year-old senior.
On a happier note, the government of Haiti has offered to name him Surgeon General and Vice President.

A woman goes for her pelvic exam. While the doctor is doing the exam, he notices bikini tan lines, and she has sandals on that say "hecho en mexico" (made in mexico). So he casually asks her, "So did you enjoy your trip to Mexico?"
She sits up a little and stares at him with this look of disbelief. "You can tell that just from a pelvic exam?!?!?"

Okay, this is an actual episode of the Newlywed Game.
The question was "What is your husband's favorite South American country?"
The first wife answered Brazil.
The second wife was a bit puzzled as to what the term "South American"
meant. She answered "New Mexico." The MC explained to her that that
was a U.S. state, not a South American country. still confused as to
what this strange adjective "South American" meant, she answered "Mexico."
The third wife was sure of her answer. She wasn't as confused as wife number
two and showed it. when it came time to give her answer, she answered very
confidently "I know what my husband's favorite South American country is:
it's Africa!" The MC allowed it.
The fourth wife answered "Mexico" as well. One out of four ain't bad.
The only husband to give the same answer as his wife was the fourth,
who answered "Mexico."

A recent study suggests that cows may know which way is north. Oh great, now we will have herds of Mexican cows crossing the border seeking a better life.

A couple go to Mexico City for vacation and go to a famous local restaurant. They ask the waiter's opinion about what to order, and he tells them they have a special each Sunday that's wonderful, so the couple orders that. With great fanfare, the waiter brings out a large silver serving platter with two huge steaming rounds of meat, juices dripping; it smells delicious and tastes even better. The couple are delighted with their meal and ask the waiter just what the fabulous meat dish was. "Senor," he explains, "each Saturday night, we have the bullfights, and that was the bull's balls you ate. The couple are a bit taken aback by what they had just eaten, but it was delicious, so they get over it. Six months later, the couple returns back in Mexico City and decide to go to the same same restaurant. Feeling adventuresome, they order the same dish. Once again, with great fanfare, the waiter brings out the huge silver serving dish and places it on the table. But this time more...

Two beggars are sitting on a park bench in Mexico City. One is holding a Cross and one a Star of David. Both are holding hats to collect contributions People walk by, lift their noses at the man with the Star of David and drop money in the hat held by the man with the cross. Soon the hat of the man with the cross is filled and the hat of the man with the Star of David is empty.

A priest watches and then approaches the men. He turns to the man with the Star of David and says:' Young man. Don't you realize that this is a Catholic country? You'll never get any contributions in this country holding a Star of David.'

The man with the Star of David turns to the man with the cross and says' Moishe, can you imagine, this guy is trying to tell us how to run our business?