Mining Jokes / Recent Jokes

Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller Brush, and W. R. Grace Company merge to become -Hale Mary Fuller Grace. Polygram Records, Warner Brothers, and Keebler Crackers merge to become -Polly-Warner-Cracker. 3M and Goodyear merge to become -MMMGood. John Deere and Abitibi-Price merge to become -Deere Abi. Zippo Manufacturing, Audi Motors, Dofasco, and Dakota Mining merge to become -Zip Audi Do Da. Honeywell, Imasco, and Home Oil merge to become -Honey I'm Home. Denison Mines, and Alliance and Metal Mining merge to become -Mine All Mine. Federal Express and UPS merge to become -FED UP. Xerox and Wurlitzer will merge and begin manufacturing reproductive organs. Fairchild Electronics and Honeywell Computers will merge and become - Fairwell Honeychild. 3M, J. C. Penney and the Canadian Opera Company will merge and become-3 Penney Opera. Knott's Berry Farm & National Organization of Women will merge and become- Knott NOW!

Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller Brush, and W.R. Grace Company merge to become -Hale Mary Fuller Grace.Polygram Records, Warner Brothers, and Keebler Crackers merge to become -Polly-Warner-Cracker.3M and Goodyear merge to become -MMMGood.John Deere and Abitibi-Price merge to become -Deere Abi.Zippo Manufacturing, Audi Motors, Dofasco, and Dakota Mining merge to become -Zip Audi Do Da.Honeywell, Imasco, and Home Oil merge to become -Honey I'm Home.Denison Mines, and Alliance and Metal Mining merge to become -Mine All Mine.Federal Express and UPS merge to become -FED UP.Xerox and Wurlitzer will merge and begin manufacturing reproductive organs.Fairchild Electronics and Honeywell Computers will merge and become - Fairwell Honeychild.3M, J.C. Penney and the Canadian Opera Company will merge and become-3 Penney Opera.Knott's Berry Farm & National Organization of Women will merge and become- Knott NOW!

A few suggestions for corporate mergers: - PolyGram Records, Warner Bros., and Keebler, to be called Poly-Warner-Cracker

- Yahoo and Netscape-to be called Net'nYahoo

- 3M and Good year, to be called MMM-Good

- Knotts Berry Farm and National Organization for Women-to be called Knott NOW

- Federal Express and UPS, to be called FED UP

- Xerox and Wurlitzer: They're going to make reproductive organs.

- Fairchild Electronics and Honeywell Computers: New company will be called Fairwell Honeychild.

- John Deere & Abitibi-Price: Deere Abi

- Honeywell, Imasco, and Home Oil: Honey, I'm Home

- Denison Mines, Alliance, and Metal Mining: Mine, All Mine

- 3M, J.C. Penney, Metropolitan Opera Company: 3 Penney Opera

- Grey Poupon & Dockers Pants: Poupon Pants

- Zippo Manufacturing, Audi, Dofasco, Dakota Mining: Zip Audi Do-Da

- Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay more...

In the wake of the Exxon/Mobil deal and the AOL/Netscape deal, here are the latest mergers we can expect to see:

Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller Brush, and W.R. Grace Company merge to become Hale Mary Fuller Grace.

Polygram Records, Warner Brothers, and Keebler Crackers merge to become Polly-Warner-Cracker.

3M and Goodyear merge to become MMMGood.

John Deere and Abitibi-Price merge to become Deere Abi.

Zippo Manufacturing, Audi Motors, Dofasco, and Dakota Mining merge to become Zip Audi Do Da.

Honeywell, Imasco, and Home Oil merge to become Honey I'm Home.

Denison Mines, and Alliance and Metal Mining merge to become Mine, All Mine.

Knott's Berry Farm and the National Organization for Women merge to become Knott NOW.

These are supposedly actual quotes taken from around the world. "That race was all about competition." - David Coleman, ITV "And I can see the strong wind blowing the sun towards us." - Brian Johnson, BBC Radio 3 Mark Goodier: What's the name of the company you work for? Listener: Mining and Engineering Services. Mark Goodier: So, what kind of work do they do is it mining and engineering services? - BBC Radio 1 "Marling - unbeaten in her three victories." Peter O'Sullivan, BBC2 TV: "Both drivers are fundamentally wearing white helmets." James Hunt, BBC2 TV: "A church spire nestling among the trees...there's probably a church there too." - Richie Benaud, BBC2 TV

On the wake of the Exxon/Mobil deal and the AOL/Netscape deal, here are the latest mergers we can expect to see:
Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller Brush, and W.R. Grace Company merge to become Hale Mary Fuller Grace.
Polygram Records, Warner Brothers, and Keebler Crackers merge to become Polly-Warner-Cracker.
3M and Goodyear merge to become MMMGood.
John Deere and Abitibi-Price merge to become Deere Abi.
Zippo Manufacturing, Audi Motors, Dofasco, and Dakota Mining merge to become Zip Audi Do Da.
Honeywell, Imasco, and Home Oil merge to become Honey I'm Home.
Denison Mines, and Alliance and Metal Mining merge to become Mine, All Mine.
Knott's Berry Farm and the National Organization for Women merge to become Knott NOW.

There appears to be no end to merger mania - one of the greatest threats to our freedom and democracy - putting more and more control into the hands of fewer and fewer people.
The following are more Mergers that appear to be on the horizon:
Honeywell, Imasco, and Home Oil
- Honey, I'm Home
Denison Mines, Alliance, and Metal Mining
- Mine, All Mine
Zippo Manufacturing, Audi, Dofasco, Dakota Mining
- Zip Audi Do-Da
Knott's Berry Farm and National Organization of Women
- Knott NOW!
John Deere and Abitibi-Price
- Deere Abi
Fairchild Electronics and Honeywell Computers
- Fairwell Honeychild
3M and Goodyear
- mmmGood
Grey Poupon and Dockers Pants
- Poupon Pants
Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller Brush Co., and W.R. Grace Co.
- Hale Mary Fuller Grace
Polygram Records, Warner Brothers and Keebler
- Poly-Warner-Cracker