Model Jokes / Recent Jokes

How many economists does it take to change a light bulb? None. If it really needed changing, market forces would have caused
It to happen. None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in. None. The invisible hand does it.
Two. One to assume the existence of ladder and one to change the bulb. Eight. One to change it and seven to hold everything
Else constant. One to prepare the proposal, an econometrician to run the model, one each ms and phd students to write the
Theses and dissertations, two more to prepare the journal article (senior authorship not assigned), four to review it, and at
Least as many to refine the model and replicate the results.

A particular model year of car wouldn't be available until AFTER that year instead of before it.
Every time they repainted the lines on the road, you'd have to buy a new car.
Occasionally your car would just die for no reason. You'd have to restart it, and for some strange reason, you'd just accept this.
You could only have one person at a time in your car, unless you bought the Car 95 or Car NT Version, but then you'd have to buy more seats.
You would be constantly pressured to upgrade your car. Wait a sec, it's that way NOW.
Sun Motorsystems would make a car that was solar powered, twice as reliable, five times as fast, but only run on 5% of the roads.
The oil, alternator, fuel, temperature, engine warning lights would be replaced with a single "General Car Fault" warning light.
People would get excited about the "new" features in Microsoft cars, forgetting completely that they have been available in other brands for years.
We more...

Natalie, a pretty but distraught model, took her troubles to a psychiatrist.
"Doctor, you must help me," she pleaded. "It's gotten so that every time a man takes me out, I wind up in bed with him. And then afterwards I feel guilty and depressed all day long."
"I see," nodded the psychiatrist. "And you want me to strengthen your will power."
"Heavens, no!" exclaimed the model. "I want you to fix it so I won't feel guilty and depressed afterward."

Miss Jones, we can't employ you as a model, the editor from themen's magazine explained. "It's too obvious that your blonde hairisn't natural, since the hair between your legs is black." The model picked up a paperweight and slammed it down on the editor'sfingers. "What the hell did you do that for!" he exploded. She smiled sweetlyand said, "Look at your fingers. They're turning black, right? Andthey've only been banged once."

The limousine was taking the beautiful raven-haired model to the airport. Halfway there, the front tire went flat. The model said, "Driver, I don't have time to wait for road service. Can you change it yourself?" The driver said, "Sure." He got out of the car and proceeded to change the tire, but couldn't get the wheel cover off. The model saw him struggling and asked, "Do you want a screwdriver?" He said "Sure! But, first I have to change this tire."

A man dies, and he`s looking in the gates of hell.

There he sees John Kennedy with an incredibly ugly girl. The man turns to the Devil and asks why John Kennedy is with this hideous looking person. The Devil replies, "Well, John has done some bad things in his life and that`s his punishment."

The man looks around a little more and sees Bill Clinton with a beautiful model. The stunned guy asks "What`s Bill Clinton doing with that model?" The devil replied, "Well, that model did some pretty bad things in her life."

Q: What do you call a little girl in a brown dress who is running across a playground?
A: A brownian motion.

Q: Why do social workers refuse to sleep with economists?
A: They have learned its a sunk cost.

Q: Why do Economists provide estimates of inflation to the nearest tenth of a percent?
A: To prove they have a sense of humour.

Q: What does it take to be a good economist?
A: An unshakeable grasp of the obvious!

Q: What is a recent economics graduate's usual question in his first job?
A: What would you like to have with your french fries sir?

Q: What's the difference between a finance major and an economics major?
A: Opportunity Cost

Q: How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
1. Just one, but it really gets screwed.
2. One to prepare the proposal, an econometrician to run the model, one each MS and PhD students to write the theses and dissertations, two more more...