Monet Jokes

A consultant is someone who takes the watch off your wrist and tells you the time.
A consultant is a man who knows 99 ways to make love, but doesn't know any women.
A consultant is someone who is called in at the last moment and paid enormous amounts of money to assign the blame.

The eye of the beholder
Mrs Stein a rich tourist goes to Paris to visit the art galleries. She decides to hire the services of a guide to show her around the Louvre.
"Oh!" said Mrs Stein looking at a painting, "That`s a Monet isn`t it?"
"No Madame, almost, it`s a Manet." replied the guide.
"And that one, it`s a Pissaro?"
"Er... no I`m sorry Madame, that`s a Monet."
"Oh, I see. Now that one I’m sure of - that`s a Picasso isn’t it?"
".... no Madame, that`s a mirror."