Monster Jokes / Recent Jokes

How do you tell a good monster from a bad one? If its a good one you will be able to talk about it later!

Could you kill a monster just by throwing eggs at him? Of course - hed be eggs-terminated.

What happened to Frankensteins monster on the road? He was stopped for speeding, fined $50 and dismantled for six months.

Stylist and costume designer Patricia Field abruptly quit the New York production of The Girls' Guide to Hunting and Fishing on Friday.

The cause? The supposed bad behavior of star Alec Baldwin.

"He was a monster... an absolute monster," groused Field, whose previous credits include overseeing the fashions worn by Sarah Jessica Parker and Kim Cattrall on Sex and the City.

"That big ape refused to wear anything I showed him. Like this, for instance. This is a couture tube dress made of Hefty Lawn and Leaf bags, embellished with thousands of doll eyes that I glued on personally. He took one look at it and left the room. I have people begging me for the chance to wear this garment!"

According to Field, 97, other "completely fabulous" items that Baldwin allegedly balked at donning were "Lucite platforms with little real fish swimming inside them," "a fierce tufted headband made out of python skin and more...

Why did the monster drink ten liters of antifreeze? So that he didnt have to buy a winter coat.

Whats a monsters favorite play? Romeo and Ghouliet

What did the monster say when he saw a rush hour train full of passengers? Oh good! A chew chew train!