Motorcycle Jokes / Recent Jokes

The following are actual incidents reported...#1A policeman had a perfect spot to watch for speeders, but wasn't getting many. Then, he discovered the problem - a 10-year old boy was standing up the road with a hand painted sign which read "RADAR TRAP AHEAD". The officer then found a young accomplice down the road with a sign reading "TIPS" and a bucket full of change.#2A motorist was mailed a picture of his car speeding through an automated radar. A $40 speeding ticket was included. Being cute, he sent the police department a picture of $40. The police responded with another mailed photo of handcuffs.#3A young woman was pulled over for speeding. As the motorcycle officer walked to her car window, flipping open his ticket book, she said, "I bet you are going to sell me a ticket to the Highway Patrolmen's Ball."He replied, "Highway patrolmen don't have balls."There was a moment of silence while she smiled, and he realized what he'd just said. He more...

THINK YOU'RE HAVING A BAD DAY.... check it out these actual cases.

Fire authorities in California found a corpse in a burned-out section of forest while assessing the damage done by a forest fire. The deceased male was dressed in a full wet suit, complete with scuba
tanks on his back, flippers, and face mask.

A postmortem test revealed that the man died not from burns, but from massive internal injuries. Dental records provided a positive identification. Investigators then set about to determine how a fully clothed diver ended up in the middle of a forest fire.

It was revealed that on the day of the fire, the man went diving off the coast, some 20 miles from the forest. The fire fighters, seeking to control the fire as quickly as possible, had called in a fleet of helicopters with very large dip buckets. Water was dipped from the ocean and emptied at the site of the forest fire.

You guessed it. One minute our diver was making like more...

The woman in question, a cute blonde as it happens, was pulled over for speeding by a California Highway Patrol motorcycle officer. When he walked up to her window and opened his ticket book she said:
"I bet you're going to sell me a ticket to the Highway Patrolmen's Ball." He replied, "No, highway patrolmen don't have balls." There followed a moment of silence while she smiled and he realized what he'd said. He then closed his book, got back on his motorcycle and left. She was laughing too hard to start her car for several minutes.

An engineering student is walking on campus one day, when another engineer student rides up on a shiny new motorcycle."Where did you get such a functional bike?" asked the first.The second engineer replied: "Well, I was walking along yesterday minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike. She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes, spread her arms wide and said: "Take what you want."The second engineer nodded approvingly: "Good choice; the clothes probably wouldn't have fit."

A mechanic was removing a cylinder head from the motor
of a Harley motorcycle when he spotted a well-known
heart surgeon in his shop. The surgeon was there
waiting for the service manager to come take a look at
his bike.
The mechanic shouted across the garage, "Hey Doc, can
I ask you a question?"
The surgeon, a bit surprised, walked over to the
mechanic working on the motorcycle.
The mechanic straightened up, wiped his hands on a rag
and asked, "So Doc, look at this engine. I open its
heart, take valves out, fix' em, put' em back in, and
when I finish, it works just like new. So how come I
get such a small salary and you get the really big
bucks, when you and I are doing basically the same
work?
The surgeon paused, smiled and leaned over, and
whispered to the mechanic..... "Try doing it with the
engine running".

(Spotted on a passing motorcycle): If you can read this, the bitch fell off!

THINK YOU'RE HAVING A BAD DAY.... check it out these actual cases. Fire authorities in California found a corpse in a burned-out section of forest while assessing the damage done by a forest fire. The deceased male was dressed in a full wet suit, complete with scubatanks on his back, flippers, and face mask. A postmortem test revealed that the man died not from burns, but from massive internal injuries. Dental records provided a positive identification. Investigators then set about to determine how a fully clothed diver ended up in the middle of a forest fire. It was revealed that on the day of the fire, the man went diving off the coast, some 20 miles from the forest. The fire fighters, seeking to control the fire as quickly as possible, had called in a fleet of helicopters with very large dip buckets. Water was dipped from the ocean and emptied at the site of the forest fire. You guessed it. One minute our diver was making like Flipper in the Pacific, the next, he was doing the more...