Nader Jokes

With Holloween coming this weekend, I figured I'd get my part started right with...
93-year-old Senator Strom Thurmond "dressed" as Tarzan wearing a Medicare badge.
A tobacco lobbyist dressed as a beggar ("There goes your campaign financing, Congressman").
Al Gore Disco Fever costume.
Attorney General Janet Reno dressed as Charles Manson.
Evil British nanny.
Flaming Tofu Burrito from Hell on a Stick.
Guy who ate too much Olestra.
Hillary Clinton dressed as Madonna dressed as Evita.
Jacko-Lantern.
Janet Reno's Little French Maid Outfit.
Marge Schott's less attractive, slightly more racist sister
Marv Albert, Warrior Princess.
Mighty Menstruatin' Power Ranger.
Pat Buchanan dressed as Detective Mark Fuhrman.
Positive Home Pregnancy Test.
President Jesse Helms.
Ralph Nader dressed as, well, Ralph Nader.
Redskins quarterback Gus Ferrotte dressed as Jack Kemp.
Representative Newt Gingrich dressed more...

Did you hear that they have removed Al Gore`s name from consideration for the University of Alabama Head Coaching job? He can`t win in Tennessee, either!
Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They should both be changed regularly... and for the same reason.
Al Gore`s Biography: "Bad Timing: A Presidential Obsession"
Gore, Nader, and Bush went on a boat trip. During their trip, the boat began to sink. As there were three of them, and only one life vest, they decided to vote on who would get it. They passed a hat around, then counted the ballots. Bush got one vote. Nader got one vote. Gore got seven votes.
"What`s the difference between Al Gore and a puppy? After three weeks, a puppy opens its eyes and stops whining."
"Why hasn`t Bush commented on the rulings? He said he didn`t think the judges were ready because he saw them in their robes this morning."
"What`s the difference between Al Gore`s inauguration and more...

John Kerry went duck hunting and he's doing that to fulfill his campaign pledge to hunt down the ducks and kill them wherever they are! Kerry did pretty well; he came back with four ducks and three Purple Hearts." -David Letterman
"John Kerry went hunting today. He said he killed a goose. He didn't bring Teresa along because he was a little rusty and he was afraid he might kill the goose that laid the golden egg." -Jay Leno
"Last week, Senator Kerry was eight points behind President Bush, today he is three points ahead. Is this the kind of indecision we want in a president?" -Announcer in a mock Bush-Cheney ad, "Late Show With David Letterman"
"Kerry scored many points with voters and pundits by finally putting to rest criticism that he's a flip-flopper. Kerry said, 'I have one position on Iraq: I'm forgainst it." -Amy Pohler, Saturday Night Live's "Weekend Update"
"John Kerry says the 'W' in George W. Bush more...

Gore, Nader, and Bush are on an airplane. Nader throws $100 dollars in one-dollar bills off the plane. "I just made one hundred people happy!," he exclaims with pride.
George Bush throws $1,000,000 in one-dollar bills off the plane. "I just made one-million Americans happy," he boasts, turning to Gore.
Without hesitation, Gore picks Bush up and throws him off the plane. "I just made the world happy."

Ralph Nader is running for president yet again. Doesn't Ralph Nader remind you of one of those guys at a party, who can't get any pussy, so he starts cockblocking everyone else at the party.

He sees Obama talking to a hot woman, "Hey Obama, she's cute, how's your WIFE doing?"