Nasruddin Jokes

One warm day, Mulla Nasruddin was taking it easy in the shade of a walnut tree. After a time, he started eyeing speculatively, the huge pumpkins rising on vines and the small walnuts growing on a majestic tree.

Sometimes I just can't understand the ways of God! He mused. Just fancy letting tiny walnuts grow on so majestic a tree and huge pumpkins on the delicate vines!

Just then a walnut snapped off and cut down smack on Mulla Nasruddin's hairless head. He got up at once and lifting up his hands and face to heavens in supplication, said:

Oh, my God! Forgive my inquiring your ways! You are all-wise. Where would I have been now, if pumpkins grew on trees!

One day some intelligent men, who were going about the nation trying to find answers to some of the great questions of their time, came to Mulla Nasruddin's region and asked to see the wisest man in the place.

Mulla Nasruddin was brought forward, and a big crowd gathered to listen.

The first intelligent guy began by asking, "Where is the exact center of the world?"

"It is under my right heel," answered Mulla Nasruddin.

"How can you confirm that?" asked the first intelligent man.

"If you don't believe me," answered Mulla Nasruddin, "measure and see."

The first clever guy had nothing to respond to that, so the second wise guy asked his question. "How many stars are there in the sky?" he said.

"As many as there are hairs on my donkey," answered Mulla Nasruddin.

"What evidence have you got of that?" asked the second more...

The humor and wisdom of Mulla Nasruddin never leaves him tongue-tied. One day an uneducated man came to Mulla Nasruddin with a letter he had received.

Mulla Nasruddin, please read this letter to me. Mulla Nasruddin looked at the letter, but could not make out a single word. So he told the man.

I am sorry, but I cannot read this.

The gentleman cried: Shame, Mulla Nasruddin! You must be ashamed before the turban you wear (i. e. the sign of education).
Mulla Nasruddin removed the turban from his own head and placed it on the head of the illiterate man, said:

There, now you wear the turban. If it gives some information read the letter yourself.

One wintry weather night while Mulla Nasruddin was sleeping he heard a noise that was suddenly made in the street. Having covered himself with his blanket, he came out to know the cause of the noise.

Suddenly a smart thief robbed him of his blanket and ran away.

He came back home without the blanket. In reply to his spouse who was asking about the reason for the noise, Mulla Nasruddin said, "All the dispute was about my blanket."

Mulla Nasruddin walked into the office of a cemetery and complained to the manager: "I know well that my wife is buried here in your cemetery but I can't find her grave."

The manager checked in his register and asked, "What is her name?"

So Mulla said, "Mistress Mulla Nasruddin."
He looked again and he said, "There is no Mistress Mulla Nasruddin, but there is a Mulla Nasruddin." So he said, "We are sorry, it seems something has gone wrong in the register."

Nasruddin said, "Nothing is wrong. Where is the grave of Mulla Nasruddin? -- because everything is in my name." Even the grave of his wife!