Navy Jokes / Recent Jokes
Aftrer serving in Afganistan, some GIs were were lucky to spend the festive season with their families. The lucky ones were in Germany to catch the connecting flight to the USA. Yet there was a considerable dealy in waiting. Hence, the last remaining nine Officers were requested to share a large army style room.
There were three of each from the Army, Ari Force and Navy respectively. As allocated they grouped into three sections of the same hall. When they were about to settle in their beds an actractive young blond was also brought to the very place as there were no accomadation anywhere else. The co-operative entertainer, did not mind in sharing the same hall as there was no other alaternative.
Following morning at the breakfast the waiter asked each group what they would like to drink. The Army, Air Force and Navy settled down with black coffee. The blond ordered, Indian Tea with no milk and suger. The the waiter asked how come she not settle for coffee. She promptly more...
The following is an actual radio conversation released by the Chief of Naval Operations:
#1: Please divert your course 15 degrees to the north to avoid a collision.
#2: Recommend you divert your course 15 degrees to south to avoid a collision.
#1: This is the captain of a U. S. navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course.
#2: No. I say again, you divert YOUR course.
#1. THIS IS THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER ENTERPRISE. WE ARE A LARGE WARSHIP OF THE U. S. NAVY. DIVERT YOUR COURSE NOW!
#2. This is a lighthouse. Your call.
Q. "Why does the Navy put Marines on board ships?" A. "Because sheep would be too obvious"
There's a Marine, an Airforce Commando, a Navy Seal and a Green Beret sitting around a campfire telling each-other how mean and tough they are.
The Marine says - "I can swim 50 miles and bite the head off a live chicken. One Marine is worth 5 other men."
The Airforce Commando says - "I can clear runways one-handed and kill a man with my bare hands. One Airforce Commando is worth 10 other men."
The Navy Seal says - "Yeah? Well I can dive up to 90 feet without air, and I'm an expert in demolitions. One Navy Seal is worth 13 other men."
The Green Beret just sat there all this time saying nothing, stirring the fire with his dick.
Q: How many British navy Officers does it take to change a light bulb? A: Only one, but it takes him seven weeks to get there.
A Navy officer was cutting through the crew's quarters of his ship one day and
happened upon a sailor reading a magazine with his feet up on the small table in front of him.“Sailor! Do you put your feet up on the furniture at home?” the officer demanded.“No, sir, but we don't land airplanes on the roof either.”