Navy Jokes / Recent Jokes
Iraq's Navy
Q: Do you know why Iraq's navy has glass bottomed ships?
A: So the sailors can see their air force!
An Army brat was boasting about his father to a Navy brat.
"My dad is an engineer. He can do everything. Do you know the Alps?"
"Yes," said the Navy brat.
"My dad has built them."
Then the naval kid spoke: "And do you know the Dead Sea?"
"Yes."
"It's my dad who's killed it!"
The reason the Air Force, Army, Navy and Marines bicker amongst themselves is that they don't speak the same language. For instance, Take the simple phrase "secure the building".The Army will post guards around the place.The Navy will turn out the lights and lock the doors.The Marines will kill everybody inside and set up a headquarters.The Air Force will take out a 5 year lease with an option to buy.
There's a guy from ARMY driving from West Point to the Meadowlands, a guy from the NAVY was driving from Annapolis to the Meadowlands, and an Air Force guy who's driving from McGwire in South Jerz to the Meadowlands just to watch the Jets. In the middle of the night with no other cars on the road they hit each other and all cars go flying off in different directions. The squid manages to climb out of his car and survey the damage. He looks at his twisted car and says, "Man, I am really lucky to be alive!" Likewise the ARMY guy scrambles out of his car and looks at his wreckage. The Air Force guy just shakes his head and says to himself, "I can't believe I survived this wreck!" The NAVY guy walks over to the ARMY and Air Force guys and says, "Hey guys, I think this is a sign from God that we should put away our petty differences and live as friends instead of arch rivals." The ARMY guy thinks for a moment and says, "You know, you're absolutely right! more...
Why does the new French Navy have glassbottom boats?
So they can see the old French Navy....
This is an actual radio conversation released by the Chief of Naval
Operations, 10-10-95, MSG#H0000115020ecb52EMHS
#1: “Please divert your course 15 degrees to the north to avoid a collision. ”
#2: “Recommend that you change YOUR course 15 degrees to the south to avoid a collision. ”
#1: “This is the captain of a U. S. navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course. ”
#2: “No, I say again divert YOUR course. ”
#1: “This is the aircraft carrier Enterprise, we are a large warship of the U. S. navy. Divert your course NOW! ”
#2: “This is a lighthouse. Your call? ”
Why does the new Polish Navy have glass bottomed boats? So they can see the old Polish Navy!