Nerve Jokes / Recent Jokes
In the beginning, the plan for a divine human design was painstakingly implemented. "How many nerve endings will I put in her hands?" asked St. Peter. "How many did we put in Adam?" asked The Lord. "Two hundred, O Mighty One." "Then we shall do the same for the woman," The Lord replied. "How many nerve endings should we put in her genitals, O Mightiest?" "How many did we put in Adam?" "Four hundred and twenty, O Mighty One." "Oh yeah, now I remember. We wanted Adam to have a little fun procreating, didn't we? Do the same for woman." "Yes, O Great Lord." "Wait! Hold it, Pete, give her ten thousand, it'll be a hoot to hear her scream out my name..."
10 year old Johnny's mother, who was a hard working single mom, had been promising for some time now to buy poor Johnny a bike.Johnny, who loved his Momma dearly, hadn't made a big deal about it for a long time, but suddenly decided NOW was the right time to ask. So he rushes downstairs to tell his Momma that he wanted his bike and he wanted it now.He gets downstairs, looks around, doesn't see his mother, so he rushes back upstairs, opens the door to his mother's room and stops dead in his tracks, 'cause there was his Momma, laying stark naked on her bed, rubbing herself all over repeating " Oh, I need a man, Ohhh I need a man."Johnny, who was naturally a little stunned by the sight, backs quietly out the door and goes back to his room.Well, a few days passes and Johnny works up the nerve to once again tell his Mother that he wants his bike and he wants it NOW. So he rushes downstairs, doesn't see his mother, he rushes upstairs, opens Momma's door and there once again was more...
Did You Know...
Did you know that in the human body there is a nerve that connects the eyeball to the anus?
It is called the anal optic nerve.
It is responsible for giving people a crappy outlook on life.
If you don't believe it, pull a hair from your ass, and see if it doesn't bring a tear to your eye.
The captain called the batsman into his room.' We've got some very tough matches coming up,' he said,' and I wanted to talk to you because we need someone with an Iron nerve, a strong constitution and great skill in the side.
That's why I'm asking you to resign.'