Opposite Jokes / Recent Jokes

At a southern university, students in the psychology program were attending their first class on emotional extremes."Just to establish some parameters," said the professor to the student from Arkansas, "what is the opposite of joy?""Sadness," said the student."And the opposite of depression?" he asked of the young lady from Oklahoma."Elation," she said."And you sir," he said to the young man from Texas, "what about the opposite of woe?"The Texan replied, "Sir, I believe that would be 'giddy up' ".

What's the opposite of Christopher Reeve?

Answer #1: Christopher Walken

Answer #2: Christopher ALIVE!

If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?

If the opposite of pro is con, then what must be the opposite of progress?

What is the opposite of a cold front? -A warm back

Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio?

If you have your finger touching the rearview mirror that says -- "objects in mirror are closer than they appear", how can that be possible?

Why is it so hard to remember how to spell MNEMONIC?

If someone invented instant water, what would they mix it with?

Why is it called a TV "set" when you only get one?

Why does your nose run and your feet smell?

Why does an alarm clock "go off" when it begins ringing?

If pro is the opposite of con, is progress the opposite of congress?

Why does "cleave" mean both split apart and stick together?

Why is it, whether you sit up or sit down, the result is the same?

The aspiring psychiatrists were attending their first class on emotional extremes.
"Just to establish some parameters," said the professor, to the student from Arkansas, "What is the opposite of joy?"
"Sadness," said the student.
"And the opposite of depression?" he asked of the young lady from Oklahoma.
"Elation," she said.
"And you sir," he said to the young man from Texas, "How about the opposite of woe?"
The Texan replied, "Sir, I believe that would be' giddy up'."