Organ Jokes / Recent Jokes

One day God came to Adam to pass on some news. "I've got some good news and some bad news," God said. Adam looked at God and said, "Well, give me the good news first." Smiling, God explained, "I've got two new organs for you. One is called a brain. It will allow you to be very intelligent, create new things, and have intelligent conversations with Eve. The other organ I have for you is called a penis. It will allow you to reproduce your now intelligent life form and populate this planet. Eve will be very happy that you now have this organ to give her children."
Adam, very excited, exclaimed, "These are great gifts you have given to me. What could possibly be bad news after such great tidings?"
God looked upon Adam and said with great sorrow, "The bad news is that when I created you, I only gave you enough blood to operate one of these organs at a time."

Q: Why are organists like a broken-winded cab horse? A: They are always longing for another stop.Q: Why are a organist's fingers like lightning? A: Because they rarely strike the same place twice.Q: What do you get if you throw a piano down a mine shaft? A: A flat miner.Q: What do you get if you drop an organ on an army base? A: A flat major.Q: Why is an 11-foot concert grand better than a studio upright? A: It makes a louder noise, when you drop it off a cliff.Q: Why was the organ invented? A: So the musician would have a place to put his beer.Q: What does a German Hammond organist do in his life's most tender moments? A: He puts his Leslie on "slow".The organ is the instrument of worship for in its sounding we sense the majesty of God and in its ending we know the Grace of God.

Here's one from the Emergency nurses association:
Be an organ donor. .. Unbuckle!

Top 10 Reasons Why E-Mail is Like a Male Reproductive Organ:
10. Those who have it would be devastated if it were ever cut off.
9. Those who have it think that those who don't are somehow inferior.
8. Those who don't have it may agree that it's neat, but think it's not worth the fuss that those who have it make about it.
7. Many of those who don't have it would like to try it (e-mail envy).
6. It's more fun when it's up, but this makes it hard to get any real work done.
5. In the distant past, its only purpose was to transmit information vital to the survival of the species. Some people still think that's the only thing it should be used for, but most folks today use it for fun most of the time.
4. If you don't apply the appropriate measures, it can spread viruses.
3. If you use it too much, you'll find it becomes more and more difficult to think coherently.
2. We attach an importance to it that is far greater than its actual size and influence more...

Poor Billy is dating a rich girl and has no idea what to give her for her birthday, (as she has everything) as he tells of his dilema to his friend, his friend suggests that he tatoo her name on his sex organ. Billy goes to a tattoo parlor and tells the man her name is Wendy. When finished he looks down and sees.. "W Y" and says "Hey I said her name was Wendy"Man says "Don't worry shake it.". . . He does,. . and voila!- Wendy. He ties a ribbon on it and presents it to his girl.. . she is so happy that she invites him on a Carribean cruise. While in port at Jamaica in a disco he goes to the bathroom. While at the urinal a tall Jamaican stands next to him glances down sees "W Y" and says "W Y, huh?" Billy says oh! its my girlfriend's name, look (shakes it.. . Wendy)Jamaican says: "Ah good show man, Wendy, very nice." Billy looks at the Jamaican and notices his organ also says "W Y". Billy says: "Hey, wait a more...

Sister Mary Holycard was in her 60s, and much admired for her sweetness and kindness to all. One afternoon early in the spring a young priest came to chat, so she welcomed him into her Victorian parlor. She then invited him to have a seat while she prepared a little tea. As he sat facing her old pump organ, the young priest noticed a crystal glass bowl sitting on top of it filled with water, and in the water floated, a condom. Well, imagine how shocked and surprised he was. Imagine his curiosity! Surely, he thought, Sister Mary had flipped or something! When she returned with tea and cookies, they began to chat, and of course, the priest tried to stifle his curiosity about the bowl of water, and the strange floater. Soon it got the better of him and he could resist no longer." Sister," he asked, "I wonder if you could tell me about this?" (pointing to the crystal bowl)"Oh, yes," she replied, "Isn't it wonderful?" "I was walking downtown more...

One day God came to Adam to pass on some news. "I've got some good news and some bad news", God said. Adam looked at God and said, "Well, give me the good news first." Smiling, God explained, "I've got two new organs for you.

One is called a brain. It will allow you to be very intelligent, create new things, and have intelligent conversations with Eve. The other organ I have for you is called a penis. It will allow you to reproduce your now intelligent life form and populate this planet. Eve will be very happy that you now have this organ to give her children."

Adam, very excited, exclaimed, "These are great gifts you have given to me. What could possibly be bad news after such great tidings?"

God looked upon Adam and said with great sorrow, "The bad news is that when I created you, I only gave you enough blood to operate one of these organs at a time."