Outbreak Jokes

The Food and Drug Administration stated late Friday that the source of the E. coli outbreak has been identified as the Jolly Green Giant.
Jolly, who was forced to stand up for years on end, while seeing his popularity fade, admitted responsibilty in a "sick" attempt to gain publicity and attention.

San Francisco - The number of people sickened by an E. coli outbreak traced to tainted spinach rose to 110 this morning as the famed Popeye The Sailor was found dead in his houseboat in the San Francisco bay area. Popeye was 98 years old.

Health officials have discovered the source of a multi-state E. coli outbreak to be bagged spinach.

In other news, Popeye was found dead at his house boat in San Francisco this morning. His wife, Olive Oyl, said he switched to bagged spinach later in life, claiming he hadn't got the, "Muskles t'open da cans n'more!! Ak! Ak! Ak! Ak! Ak! Ak!"