Pig Jokes / Recent Jokes
Pig's explanation for the creation of the Universe: The Pig Bang Theory.
There was once a man from the city who was visiting a small farm, and during this visit he saw a farmer feeding pigs in a most extraordinary manner. The farmer would lift a pig up to a nearby apple tree, and the pig would eat the apples off the tree directly. The farmer would move the pig from one apple to another until the pig was satisfied, then he would start again with another pig. The city man watched this activity for some time with great astonishment. Finally, he could not resist saying to the farmer, "This is the most inefficient method of feeding pigs that I can imagine. Just think of the time that would be saved if you simply shook the apples off the tree and let the pigs eat them from the ground!"The farmer looked puzzled and replied, "What's time to a pig?"
The hog was a failure as a TV talk show host What happened? He turned out to be a big boar.
Q: What do you call a blonde with half a brain?
A: Gifted!
Q: How do blonde braincells die?
A: Alone.
Q: How do you brainwash a blonde?
A: Give her a douche and shake her upside down.
Q: What do you call it when a blonde dies their hair brunette?
A: Artificial intelligence.
Q: How does a blonde part their hair?
A: (Action of scissoring legs apart)
Q: Why do blondes wash their hair in the sink?
A: Because, that's where you're supposed to wash vegetables!
Q: What was the blond psychic's greatest achievment?
A: An IN-body experience!
Q: When does a brunette have 1/2 of a brain?
A: After a dye job.
Q: Why is the blonde's brain the size of a pea in the morning?
A: It swells at night.
Q: Why didn't the blonde want a window seat on the plane?
A1: She'd just dyed her hair.
A2: She'd just blow dried her hair and she didn't want it blown more...
Q. Why did the three little pigs decide to leave home?
A. They thought their father was an awful boar.
The kids are crazy about a new piglet toy. When they wind it up, it eats all the spinach off their plates.