Pin Jokes / Recent Jokes

When the employees of a restaurant attended a fire safety seminar, they watched a fire official demonstrate the proper way to operate an extinguisher. "Pull the pin like a hand grenade," he explained, "then depress the trigger to release the foam."Later an employee was selected to extinguish a controlled fire in the parking lot. In her nervousness, she forgot to pull the pin. The instructor hinted, "Like a hand grenade, remember?"In a burst of confidence she pulled the pin -- and hurled the extinguisher at the blaze.

What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you? - Take the pin out of it and throw it back!!! What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you? - RUN she’s got a grenade in her hand!!! Why did God make blondes 2% smarter than horses? - So they don’t shit in the street during a parade. What do call three blondes in a freezer? - Frosted flakes

Pleased to inform customers that the YorkshireBank are now installing the Next Generation of new "Drive-thru" cash point machines: Customers will in future be able to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles. To enable users to use this new facility the following procedures have been drawn up. Please read the procedure that applies to you (Male Or Female).
Please remember and follow these instructions when you use the machine for the first time.
MALE PROCEDURE
1 Drive up to the cash machine.
2 Wind down your car window.
3 Insert card into machine and enter PIN.
4 Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.
5 Retrieve card, cash and receipt
6 Wind up window
7 Drive off
FEMALE PROCEDURE
1 Drive up to cash machine
2 Reverse back the required amount to align car
3 Re-start the stalled engine
4 Wind down the window
5 Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.
6 Turn the more...

How a BOY withdraws cash from ATM
1. Park the car
2. Go to ATM Machine
3. Insert card
4. Enter PIN
5. Take money out
6. Take ATM Card out
7. Drive away
How a GIRL withdraws cash from ATM
1. Park the car
2. Check makeup
3. Turn off engine
4. Check makeup
5. Go to ATM
6. Hunt for ATM card in the purse
7. Insert card
8. Hit Cancel
9. Hunt in purse for chit with PIN written on it
10. Insert card
11. Enter PIN
12. Take cash
13. Go to car
14. Check makeup
15. Start car
16. Stop car
17. Run back to ATM
18. Take ATM card
19. Back to car
20. Check makeup
21. Start car
22. Check makeup
23. Drive for 1/2 mile
24. Release handbrake

MALE PROCEDURE 1. Drive up to cash machine.
2. Wind down your car window
3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN
4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw
5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt
6. Wind up window
7. Drive off. FEMALE PROCEDURE 1. Drive up to cash machine
2. Reverse back the required amount to align car window to machine
3. Re-start stalled engine
4. Wind down the window
5. Find handbag, remove all contents onto passenger seat to locate card
6. Locate make-up bag and check make-up in rear view mirror
7. Attempt to insert card into machine
8. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from car
9. Insert card
10. Re-insert card the right way up
11. Re-enter handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page
12. Enter PIN
13. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN
14. Enter amount of cash required
15. Re-check make-up in more...

BRAIN TUMOR
Doctor: I regret to tell you that you have a brain tumor.
Mr. Bean: Yesss!!! (jumps in joy)
Doctor: Did you understand what I just told you?
Mr. Bean: Yes of course, do you think I'm dumb?
Doctor: Then why are you so happy?
Mr. Bean: Because that proves that I have a brain!
****
MR. BEAN WHILE IN GRADE SCHOOL
Teacher: What is 5 plus 4?
Mr. Bean: 9
Teacher: What is 4 plus 5?
Mr. Bean: Are you trying to fool me, you've just twisted the figure, the answer is 6!!
****
WHILE IN A DRUG STORE
Mr. Bean: I'd like some vitamins for my grandson.
Clerk: Sir, vitamin A, B or C?
Mr. Bean: Any will do, my grandson doesn't know the alphabet yet!!
****
QUEUING BEHIND HIS FRIEND AT AN ATM MACHINE
Friend: What are you looking at?
Mr. Bean: I know your PIN no., hee, hee.
Friend: Alright, what is my PIN no. if you saw it?
Mr. Bean: four asterisks!
****
Friend: how many more...

When the employees of a restaurant attended a fire safety seminar, they watched a fire official demonstrate the proper way to operate an extinguisher. "Pull the pin like a hand grenade," he explained, "then depress the trigger to release the foam." Later an employee was selected to extinguish a controlled fire in the parking lot. In her nervousness, she forgot to pull the pin. The instructor hinted, "Like a hand grenade, remember?" In a burst of confidence she pulled the pin -- and hurled the extinguisher at the blaze.