Pink Jokes / Recent Jokes

One night a man is driving when his car breaks down in the middle of the street. He walks to the nearest house and rings the doorbell. A little old lady answers the door wearing a pink robe and pink slippers. The man asks if he can use her phone to call a toe truck. The old lady tells him it is to late to call for a toe truck so he can stay the night w/ her and call in the morning. She takes him through the pink hallway, up the pink stairs, through another pink hallway to the 3rd pink door to the right. She tells him that this is where he will sleep for the night. she walks back down the pink hall to the 1st pink door on the left and open the door. She walks in and takes off her pink robe and pink slippers, turns off the pink light and gets into her pink bed. About an hour later the doorbell rings agian. She put on her pink slippers and her pin robe, crawles out of her pink bed, turns on the pink light and leaves the room. She walks down the pink hallway, down the pink stairs, down more...

This week, I am at home and playing house husband. My wife left a list of things I need to do. This is so easy, I thought I would share it with you.

1. Make the beds. What a waste of effort, we're only going to sleep in them again tonight. Forget that. Scratch one.

2. Pick up dog poop in yard. It snowed last night, I don't see any dog poop, kids do you see any dog poop? Scratch two.

3. Drop your shirts off at the cleaners. Duh, I'm on vacation, I don't need them. Scratch three.

This is easy! What's the fuss? Think I'll go on AOL for awhile.

4. Clean out Tupperware cabinet. Uh, that's a hard one. Got it! Velcro on the door will keep them closed. Scratch four.

5. Mop kitchen floor. The dog licked up that sugar spill from breakfast, floor looks clean to me. Scratch five. Good doggie, go play in the yard. She just loves rolling in the snow.

6. Find something fun for the kids to do. That tinfoil in the microwave more...

Q: What is the pink stuff between elephants toes? A: Slow clowns.

To test the English knowledge of three candidates at a job interview, the interview panel conducted a test which required each of the candidate to write a simple sentence using the words green, pink and yellow.
Guy from Germany wrote... My sisters room is pink. My Mothers car is green and I drive a Yellow car.
Guy from France wrote.... Green is my dad's favorite color. Pink is for girls and yellow is for boys.
Guy from India goes.... In the morning my phone green, green. I pink it up and say yellow.

One afternoon, there was this good witch who was flying along, when all of a sudden, she heard this soft crying from down below. When she landed, she saw this yellow frog. Touched by his sadness, the witch asked why he was crying.
"Sniff. None of the other frogs will let me join in all their frog games. Boo hoo."
"Don't cry, little one.", replied the witch, and with a wave of her magic wand, the frog turned green. All happy now, the frog was checking himself over when he noticed that his penis was still yellow. He asked an embarrassed witch about this, and she told him that there were some things that she just couldn't do, but if he saw the wizard, he'd fix things up for him.
So happily, the little green frog hippity-hopped along his merry way. Feeling quite pleased with herself, the witch once more took to the skies, and once again, she heard some crying, but this time of a thunderous sort. So down to the ground she flew only to discover a pink more...

One afternoon, there was this good witch who was flying along, when all of a sudden, she heard this soft crying from down below. When she landed, she saw this yellow frog. Touched by his sadness, the witch asked why he was crying."Sniff. None of the other frogs will let me join in all their frog games. Boo hoo.""Don't cry, little one.", replied the witch, and with a wave of her magic wand, the frog turned green. All happy now, the frog was checking himself over when he noticed that his penis was still yellow. He asked an embarrassed witch about this, and she told him that there were some things that she just couldn't do, but if he saw the wizard, he'd fix things up for him.So happily, the little green frog hippity-hopped along his merry way. Feeling quite pleased with herself, the witch once more took to the skies, and once again, she heard some crying, but this time of a thunderous sort. So down to the ground she flew only to discover a pink elephant.The witch more...

What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?
A dead centipede.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?
An in-car-nation.