Playground Jokes / Recent Jokes

Britain's first outdoor playground for the elderly recently opened with dozens of older people flocking to exercise in the winter air. The equipment, set up next to an existing children's playground, includes a static cycling machine, another that mimics the workout given by skiing and others that can be used by wheelchair users. To save taxpayer money, the two playgrounds share the same diaper changing area.

Whats a Pussy? After school one day Tod, an eager second-grader, came up to his mother and asked, "Mom, whats a pussy?" Somewhat startled by the question, but directing her answer away from the adult definition, the mother replied, "Son, sometimes people say the word pussy, for short, when they really mean pussycat. You know like Boots, the cat that lives next door. Boots could be called a pussy or better yet, pussycat." That didnt compute with what Tod heard on the playground that day, but he continued, "Mom, what about a bitch? What is a bitch?" She pursued her puritanical theme by answering, "Tod, an adult female dog is commonly referred to as a bitch. But Son, where did you hear such words?" "From the fourth-graders on the playground, Mom," he replied. "I think you should play with your second-grade friends and stay away from those fourth-graders," the mother stated. Later, Tod found his dad working in the garage. He went more...

A blonde, out of money and down on her luck after buying air at a real bargain, needed money desperately. To raise cash, she decided to kidnap a child and hold him for ransom. She went to the local playground, grabbed a kid randomly, took her behind a building, and told her, "I've kidnapped you." She then wrote a big note saying, "I've kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning, put $10, 000 in a paper bag and leave it under the apple tree next to the slides on the south side of the playground. Signed, A blonde." The blonde then pinned the note to the kid's shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents. The next morning the blonde checked, and sure enough, a paper bag was sitting beneath the apple tree. The blonde looked in the bag and found the $10, 000 with a note that said, "How could you do this to a fellow blonde?"

A blonde was down on her luck. In order to raise some money, she decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom. She went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree, and told him, "I’ve kidnapped you." She then wrote a note saying, "I’ve kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning, put $10, 000 in a paper bag and put it under the pecan tree next to the slide on the north side of the playground. Signed, A Blonde." The blonde pinned the note to the kid’s shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents. The next morning the blonde checked, and sure enough, a paper bag was sitting beneath the pecan tree. The blonde opened up the bag and found the $10, 000 with a note that said, "How could you do this to a fellow blonde?"

A Blonde was down on her luck. In order to raise some money, she decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom. She went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree, and told him, “I’ve kidnapped you. ” She then wrote a note saying, ”I’ve kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning, put $10, 000 in a paper bag and put it under the pecan tree next to the slide on the north side of the playground. Signed, A Blonde”. The Blonde then pinned the note to the kid’s shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents. The next morning the Blonde checked, and sure enough, a paper bag was sitting beneath the pecan tree. The Blonde opened up the bag and found the $10, 000 with a note that said, “How could you do this to a fellow Blonde? ”

A Blonde was down on her luck. In order to raise some money, she decided to
kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom.
She went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree, and
told him, "I've kidnapped you."
She then wrote a note saying, "I've kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning,
put $10,000 in a paper bag and put it under the pecan tree next to the slide
on the north side of the playground.
Signed, A Blonde."
The Blonde then pinned the note to the kid's shirt and sent him home to
show it to his parents. The next morning the blonde checked, and sure enough,
a paper bag was sitting beneath the pecan tree. The Blonde opened the bag and
found the $10,000 with a note that said, "How could you do this to a fellow
Blonde?"