Population Jokes / Recent Jokes
The word "racecar", "kayak", and "radar" are the same whether they are read left to right or right to left.
"a man a plan a canal panama" spelled backwards is still "a man a plan a canal panama"
A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out.
A snail can sleep for three years.
Dueling is legal in Paraguay as long as both parties are registered blood donors.
"Go." is the shortest complete sentence in the English language.
If the population of China walked past you in single file, the line would never end because of the rate of reproduction.
The cruise liner, Queen Elizabeth 2, moves only six inches for each gallon of diesel that it burns.
Eskimos use refrigerators to keep food FROM freezing.
The only 15 letter word that can be spelled without repeating a letter is uncopyrightable.
Every time you lick a stamp, you're consuming more...
All polar bears are left handed.
Ten percent of the human population is left handed.
In conclusion, ten percent of the human population are polar bears.
The pope is one.
I am one.
In conclusion, I must be the pope.
SAVE THE BOGAN (maximumus tightblackjeanus withmulletus)
First identified as a sub-species during the mid-70s, the Bogan is thought to be a close relation of the Booner (found in Canberra's outer suburbs) and the Westie (spread throughout Western Sydney). It is believed the initial Perth bogan population was introduced to purpose-built habitats such as Rockingham and Balga. However, by the mid-80s, the species had multiplied to plague proportions, spreading through much of Gosnells and outer-Mirrabooka. While authorities considered a culling program, they need not have bothered, as the regional population began a rapid decline from the early O90s onwards. The situation has now reached a critical point, with Bogans rarely sighted in Central Perth, and those remaining clinging to the region's outskirts.
In the year 2000, the species is now officially endangered. Identifying a Bogan is not difficult. Males sport a distinctive hair growth called a "mullet" more...
A Teacher was lecturing on Population Explosion - "In India after every 10 sec a woman gives birth to a kid."
Santa stood up and said - "we must find & stop her!".
The National Institute of Health (NIH) announced a new standard for medical testing.
Testing on rats will be terminated, and in the future live animal testing will be performed using lawyers. The NIH presented the following explanation for its decision:
Some lab assistants were becoming quite attached to their rats, and it was important to find an alternative which would not inspire emotional involvment.
The population of attorneys grows at a faster rate than the population of rats.
Lawyers contribute less to society, and thus are more expendable than rats.
Animal rights societies do not oppose experimentation on lawyers.
There are some things even a rat won't do.
The NIH is trying to resolve concerns raised by this change, that using lawyers for testing may render it more difficult to extrapolate test results to human beings.