Prescription Jokes / Recent Jokes

So this older guy goes to the doctor asking for a prescription for Viagra. The guy asks for a large dose of the *strongest* variety. The doctor asks why he needs so much and the guy says that two young nymphomaniacs are spending a week at his place. The doctor fills the prescription. Later that week, the same guy goes back to the doctor asking for pain killers. The doctor asks 'why, is your member really in that much pain?!''No', says the guy, 'it's for my wrists - the girls never showed up!'

Santa's father comes home from his doctor and, though usually quite active with his grand-children, seems to make every effort to avoid them this day.
Santa notices his dad avoiding the kids and asks him why this is so.
Immediately the old man whisks his medicine prescription out of his pocket and hands it to Santa.
His father said, "Read that label. That's why!"
Santa takes the bottle and reads, "Take two pills a day. KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN."

Lady says to pharmacist: “Why does my prescription medication have 40 side effects? ”

Pharmacist replies: “Because that’s all we’ve documented so far. ”

Santa's father comes home from his doctor and, though usually quite active with his grand-children, seems to make every effort to avoid them this day.
Santa notices his dad avoiding the kids and asks him why this is so.
Immediately the old man whisks his medicine prescription out of his pocket and hands it to Santa.
His father said, "Read that label. That's why!"
Santa takes the bottle and reads, "Take two pills a day. KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN."

BY ERYK SALVAGGIO
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1. Norvasc
2. Xentrix
3. Skelaxin
4. Glycolax
5. Eidolon
6. Acyclovir
7. Hirax
8. Mythotyn
9. Krabathor
10. Ilium
11. Ketek
12. Insomnium
13. Armour Thyroid
14. Depakote
15. Lantus
16. Diovan
17. Zetia
18. Gorgoroth
19. Amebix
20. Finntroll
21. Behexen
22. Flonase
23. Xalatan
24. Avelox
25. Ted Nugent
26. Treponem Pal
27. Advair Diskus
28. Zocor
29. Ensiferum
30. Ambien
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Answers:

Metal bands:
2, 5, 7, 8, 9, 10, 12, 18, 19, 20, 21, 23, 25, 26, 29
Prescription drugs:
1, 3, 4, 6, 11, 13, 14, 16, 17, 22, 24, 27, 28, 30

So this older guy goes to the doctor asking for a prescription for' Viagra'. The guy asks for a large dose of the *strongest* variety. The doctor asks why he needs so much. The guy says that two young nymphomaniacs are spending a week at his place. The doctor fills the prescription.
Later that week, the same guy goes back to the doctor asking for pain killers. The doctor asks' why, is your dick in that much pain?',' no', says the guy,' it's for my wrists - the girls never showed up!'

A man at the pharmacy to pick up his Viagra prescription exclaimed over the $10/pill price. His wife, who was with him, had a different opinion: "Oh, $40 a year isn't too bad."