Prison Jokes / Recent Jokes

Labor or Hard Labor.....you decide! In prison you spend the majority of your time in an 8`x 10` cell. At work you spend most of your time in a 6`x 8`cubicle. In prison you get three meals a day. At work you only get a break for one meal and you have to pay for it. In prison you get time off for good behavior. At work you get rewarded for good behavior with more work. In prison a guard locks and unlocks all the doors for you. At work you must carry around a security card and unlock and open all the doors yourself. In prison you can watch TV and play games. At work you get fired for watching TV and playing games. In prison they allow your family and friends to visit. At work you cannot even speak to your family and friends. In prison all expenses are paid by taxpayers with no work required. At work you get to pay all the expenses to go to work and then they deduct taxes from your salary to pay for prisoners. In prison you spend most of your life looking through the bars from the inside more...

President Obama held his first White House state dinner,honoring India.The party was apparently crashed by former Guantanamo Bay detainees Harold & Kumar.

IN PRISON.......You spend the majority of your time in an 8x10 cell.
AT WORK..........You spend most of your time in a 6x8 cubicle.

IN PRISON.......You get three meals a day.
AT WORK.........You get a break for 1 meal and you have to pay for it.

IN PRISON.......You get time off for good behavior.
AT WORK..........You get rewarded for good behavior with more work.

IN PRISON.......A guard locks and unlocks all the doors for you.
AT WORK........You must carry around a security card and unlock and open all the doors yourself.

IN PRISON........You can watch TV and play games.
AT WORK..........You get fired for watching TV and playing games.

IN PRISON.......You get your own toilet.
AT WORK..........You have to share.

IN PRISON.......They allow your family and friends to visit.
AT WORK..........You cannot even speak to your family and friends.

IN PRISON.......All expenses are paid more...

What do dentists and prison guards have in common...They both have to deal with cavity searches on a daily basis....

The following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny.February 10, 1993FBI and Florida authorities arrested Paul E. Flasher, 45, who had been sentenced to five years in prison in 1980 for grand theft but who had never been jailed.Flasher said he had gone home from the sentencing hearing in Tampa and "sat tight," just as his lawyer had instructed, waiting for notification to report to prison. Authorities forgot him for 12 years.

Judge ordered Guantanamo detainee freed. Abd al Rahim Abdul Rassak quoted as saying, "I'm going to Disney World... and then I'm going to blow it up."

Prison life versus a full-time jobIn prison you spend the majority of your time in an 8' X 10' cell. At work you spend most of your time in a 6' X 8' cubicle. In prison you get three meals a day. At work you only get a break for one meal and you have to pay for that one. In prison you get time off for good behavior. At work you get rewarded for good behavior with more work. In prison a guard locks and unlocks all the doors for you. At work you must carry around a security card and unlock and open all the doors yourself. In prison you can watch TV and play games. At work you get fired for watching TV and playing games. In prison they ball-and-chain you when you go somewhere. At work you are just ball-and-chained. In prison you get your own toilet. At work you have to share. In prison they allow your family and friends to visit. At work you cannot even speak to your family and friends. In prison all expenses are paid by taxpayers, with no work required. At work you get to pay all the more...