Puns Jokes / Recent Jokes

There was a beloved man in Korea named Rhee. He worked as a stringer for LIFE magazine. Once while on assignment in a remote mountain area he became lost and wasn't heard from for several weeks. A search party was sent to look for this him.After days in the wilderness, they received word that he was alive, but ill, in a remote village. When the leader of the search party finally located the respected old man, he said:"Ah, sweet Mr. Rhee of Life at last I've found you!"

There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.
Unfortunately, no pun in ten did

A man was blissfully driving along the highway when he saw the Easter Bunny hopping across the middle of the road. He swerved to avoid hitting the bunny, but unfortunately the rabbit jumped in front of his car and was hit. The basket of eggs went flying all over the place. Candy, too.

The driver, being a sensitive man as well as an animal lover, pulled over to the side of the road and got out to see what had become of the bunny carrying the basket. Much to his dismay, the colorful bunny was dead.

The driver felt guilty and began to cry. A woman driving down the same highway saw the man crying on the side of the road and pulled over. She stepped out of her car and asked the man what was wrong.' 'I feel terrible,'' he explained.' 'I accidentally hit the Easter Bunny and killed it. There may not be an Easter because of me. What should I do?''

The woman told the man not to worry. She said she knew exactly what to do. She went to her car trunk and pulled more...

A Russian couple were walking down the street in Moscow one night, when the man felt a drop hit his nose.' 'I think it's raining'', he said to his wife.

' 'No, that felt more like snow to me'', she replied.

' 'No, I'm sure it was just rain'', he said.

Well, as these things go, they were about to have a major argument about whether it was raining or snowing when they saw a communist party official walking toward them.

' 'Let's not fight about it'', the man said,' 'Let's ask Comrade Rudolph whether it's officially raining or snowing''.

As the official approached, the man said,' 'Tell us, Comrade Rudolph, is it officially raining or snowing?''

' 'It's raining, of course'', he replied, and walked on.

But the woman insisted:' 'I know that felt like snow!''

To which the man quietly replied:' 'Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear''

In a ancient country the king decided to marry of his daughter to the son of the king of the neighboring kingdom. And so a deal was made and the very young couple married. The honeymoon was spent in the castle of the groom. The king not being sure of the knowledge of the fair sex decided to spend one of his lackeys to spy on the couple and report as to what took place.

The next day the lackey reported. Sire I peeked through the keyhole and heard the young maiden say: sir I offer you my honor. Your son replied with madam, I honor your offer. and that's how it went through the night, Honor, offer, honor, offer

There was an annoying clerk who worked in a downtown office. In particular, he had two habits which drove his co-workers batty. First of all, there was the squeaky wheel on his chair. All day long, his every movement was announced through the building. Worse yet though, was his habit of telling bad puns. You would have thought the office was an infirmary from the sound of the groans. One day, after opening his lunch box and stating that the wurst was yet to come, things finally came to a head. It seemed that violence would shortly ensue if nothing was done.

It was at this point when the office's good Samaritan stepped in. He sat the clerk down and talked over the problems with him. He got the clerk's promise to stop with the puns and to fix the wheels on his chair. Just a short while later, all were overjoyed to see him on his knees with an oilcan by his chair. The good Samaritan came walking up, and with a broad smile stated how happy he was to see him "casting oil on more...

The following breeds are now recognized by the AKC:

Collie + Lhasa Apso
Collapso, a dog that folds up for easy transport

Spitz + Chow Chow
Spitz-Chow, a dog that throws up a lot

Pointer + Setter
Poinsetter, a traditional Christmas pet

Great Pyrenees + Dachshund
Pyradachs, a puzzling breed

Pekingnese + Lhasa Apso
Peekasso, an abstract dog

Irish Water Spaniel + English Springer Spaniel
Irish Springer, a dog fresh and clean as a whistle

Labrador Retriever + Curly Coated Retriever
Lab Coat Retriever, the choice of research scientists

Newfoundland + Basset Hound
Newfound Asset Hound, a dog for financial advisors

Terrier + Bulldog
Terribull, a dog that makes awful mistakes

Bloodhound + Labrador
Blabador, a dog that barks incessantly

Malamute + Pointer
Moot Point, owned by....oh, well, it doesn't matter more...