Pupil Jokes / Recent Jokes

Teacher: What's 2 and 2 Pupil: 4 Teacher: That's good Pupil: Good? , that's perfect!

Teacher: How much is half of 8 Pupil: Up and down or across? Teacher: What do you mean? Pupil: Well,up and down makes a 3 or across the middle leaves a 0

Pupil: Sir, would you mind e-mailing my exam results to my parents? Teacher: But your parents don't have a comuter. Pupil: Exactly!

Pupil: In other schools, pupils get a choice of computers to use. Teacher: You get a choice her, too. Use the one weve got or dont use any at all.

The lady teacher asks the pupils what kind of medicines they know and what they are used for.
The first pupil said: Panadol?
Very good! And what is it used for?
It is used for headache.
The second pupil said: Piriton
Excellent. And what it is used for?
To help you sleep
Now it is Johnny's turn and he said: Viagra
Johnny. What is it used for?
I think it can be used for diarrhoea.
Who told you this?
Nobody, but every evening my mother tells my father' take a Viagra, may be that little shit will get harder'.

Pupil: I dont think I deserved zero on this test! Teacher: I agree, but thats the lowest mark I could give you!

Teacher: What are you reading? Pupil: I dunno! Teacher: But you're reading aloud! Pupil: But I'm not listening!