Qantas Jokes

A mother and her son were flying Qantas from Perth to Sydney. The son, who had been looking out the window, turned to his mother and said,"Why don't big planes have baby planes?"

The mother, who couldn't think of an answer, told her son to ask the flight attendant. So, the little boy asked the flight attendant, "If big dogs have baby dogs and big cats have baby cats, why don't big planes have baby planes?"

The flight attendant asked, "Did your mother tell you to ask me that?"

The boy replied "yes".

With a clever grin, the flight attendant said, "Tell your mother it's because Qantas always pulls out on time."

A mother and her son were flying Qantas from Perth to Sydney (in seats 24E and 24F).

The son, who had been looking out the window, turned to his mother and said,"Why don't big planes have baby planes?"

The mother, who couldn't think of an answer, told her son to ask the flight attendant.

So, the little boy asked the flight attendant, "If big dogs have baby dogs and big cats have baby cats, why don't big planes have baby planes?"

The flight attendant asked, "Did your mother tell you to ask me that?"

The boy said that she had.

With a clever grin, the flight attendant said, "Tell your mother it's because Qantas always pulls out on time."

After every flight, Qantas pilots fill out a form, called a "gripesheet," which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft. The mechanics correct the problems, document their repairs on the form And then pilots review the gripe sheets before the next flight.
Never Let it be said that ground crews lack a sense of humor. Here are some Actual maintenance complaints submitted by Qantas' pilots (marked with a P) and the solutions recorded (marked with an S) by maintenance Engineers.
P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.
P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.
P: Something loose in cockpit.
S: Something tightened in cockpit
P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on back-order.
P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute Descent.
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.
P: Evidence of leak more...