Question Jokes / Recent Jokes

Question and the Answer given by Candidates, oh sorry they are IAS
(Indian Administrative Services - THE most difficult examination in
India . Candidates are graduate Officers now.

Q. How can you drop a raw egg onto a concrete floor without cracking it?
A. Concrete floors are very hard to crack! (UPSC Topper)

Q. If it took eight men ten hours to build a wall, how long would it
take four men to build it?
A. No time at all it is already built. (UPSC 23 rd Rank Opted for IFS)

Q. If you had three apples and four oranges in one hand and four
apples and three oranges in the other hand, what would you have?
A. Very large hands.(Good one) (UPSC 11 Rank Opted for IPS)

Q. How can you lift an elephant with one hand?
A. It is not a problem, since you will never find an elephant with
one hand. (UPSC Rank 14 Opted for IES)

Q. How can a man go eight days without sleep?
A. No Probs, He sleeps at more...

A successful scientist was on his way to a seminar where he was supposed to give a lecture on his new breakthrough in research. His chauffeur saw his tired look and felt sorry for him.
"Sir, why don't you take the day off today", he said, "I've heard your lecture so many times by now I know it by heart. I can give the lecture and you can just sit back and relax."
The scientist thought this was a great idea, since he was sick and tired of giving the exact same lecture over and over again.
When they arrived at the seminar the scientist put on the chauffeur's hat and seated himself in the back of the lecture hall. His trusted chauffeur walked to the podium and gave an excellent lecture showing at least as much confidence as the scientist would.
At the end of the lecture the chauffeur asked, just as his master always does, "Are there any questions?"
One of the professors in the hall stood up and asked a long question about a very more...

A garbage collector, a teacher and a lawyer all die and go to heaven. When they arrive at the Pearly Gates, St. Peter meets them and informs them there will be a test before they can enter. Each of them must answer one question.
First, St. Peter asks the teacher, "Can you name the ship that crashed into an iceberg and sank with all its passengers?"
Thinking for a moment, the teacher replies, "I believe that would be the Titanic." "Correct," says St. Peter and the teacher enters.
St. Peter turns to the garbage collector next and figuring that Heaven really doesn't need all the smell that guy would bring in with him, he decides to make the question a little more difficult. "How many people died on the ship?" he asks.
Taking a wild guess, the garbage man says, "1228." "That happens to be right, you may enter," says St. Peter.
Finally, St. Peter turns to the lawyer, "Name them!"

At the Henry Street Hebrew School, Mr. Goldblatt, the new teacher, finished the day's lesson. It was now time for the usual question period.
"Mr. Goldblatt," announced little Joey, "there's somethin' I can't figure out."
"What's that Joey?" asked Mr. Goldblatt.
"Well accordin' to the Bible, the Children of Israel crossed the Red Sea, right?"
"Right."
"An' the Children of Israel beat up the Phillistines, right?"
"Er - right."
"An' the Children of Israel built the Temple, right?"
"Again you're right."
"An' the Children of Israel fought the 'gyptians, an' the Children of Israel fought the Romans, an' the Children of Israel wuz always doin' somethin' important, right?"
"All that is right, too," agreed Mr. Goldblatt. "So what's your question?"
"What I wanna know is this," asked Joey, "What wuz the grown-ups doin' more...

An inmate at the insane asylum was being examined for possible release. The first question the examining doctor asked was: "What are you going to do when you leave this institution?"
"I'm gonna get me a sling shot," said the patient, "and I'm gonna come back here and break every goddam window in the place!"
After six more months of treatment, the patient was again brought before the examining doctor for possible dismissal, and the same question was put to him.
"Well, I'm going to get a job," the patient replied.
"Fine," said the doctor. "Then what?"
"I'm going to rent an apartment."
"Very good."
"Then I'm going to meet a beautiful girl."
"Excellent."
"I'm going to take the beautiful girl up to my apartment and I'm going to pull up her skirt."
"Normal, perfectly normal."
"Then I'm gonna steal her garter, make more...

An 8-year-old girl went to her dad, who was working in the yard. She asked him, "Daddy, what is sex?" The father was surprised that she would ask such a question, but decides that if she is old enough to ask the question, then she is old enough to get a straight answer.
He proceeded to tell her all about the "birds and the bees." When he finished explaining, the little girl was looking at him with her mouth hanging open. The father asked her, "Why did you ask this question?" The little girl replied, "Mom told me to tell you that dinner would be ready in just a couple of secs."

A man came home drunk at four in the morning, and his wife was all over him, yelling at him, crying because she thought he was with another woman."No, honey, I swear, I was at this bar, and it was so fancy that even the urinals were made of GOLD!"She said she didn't believe him, so she called the bar."Hello," she said, "I just want to ask one question. My husband claims to have spent the night at your bar and I have one question; are your urinals covered in gold?"To which she heard the bartender say, "Hey, Clarence, - I think we found the guy who pissed in your saxophone!"