Restore Jokes / Recent Jokes

Some key definitions to help decode Clinton`s speeches. More will be added as the President`s meaning becomes clear. Remember, do not attach meaning to words, it`s symbolism that is important.

All - Clinton`s constituency. as: We ALL must make sacrifices to restore America`s economic health.

Ask - Clintoneze for legislate. i. e. asking: legislating.

Campaign promise - actually, this is a misspelling. It really is champagne promise.

Change - (verb) redefinition of the term "tax cut" to its true meaning, "contribution". (noun) That portion of your income that will now be heading to Washington, As: The change we are asking for is necessary if we are to restore America`s (and, uh, Washington`s) economy to number one in the world.

Contribution - that portion of your "excess" income that Washington believes it can make better use of than you. This `90s term is designed to make you feel good while Uncle Sam more...

Boy, it really galls my threads when these ignoramuses go off about how the Corvette crowd is 'over-restoring' cars! I say, restored means *exactly* as the factory did it, no matter what. I spent 95 weeks last year doing an accurate and complete ground-up restoration on my '67. And, let me tell you, some of those rubber and glass pieces are *really* hard to restore after grinding them up! Thankfully, the metal pieces are easy to remelt and form.
For some folks, simply applying a bit of overspray while painting is 'good enough.' I scoff at this. I meticulously copied onto the mufflers, droplet by droplet, the exact overspray pattern that was there originally. Even the runs and sags at the bottom of the door panels were duplicated. Your average 'restorer' will just slap some new paint on, calling it 'original' if it is the same color. Jeeez. I chemically removed every vestige of *the original paint*, then broke it down, reformulated it, and re-applied it. Sure, I had to use more...